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Topics - _noXiouS_
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141
« on: May 20, 2011, 11:09:50 AM »
When genie offers Aladdin 3 wishes, why isn't one of his wishes to have limitless wishes?  :
142
« on: May 15, 2011, 12:43:13 PM »
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;
If you can dream---and not make dreams your master;
If you can think---and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same:.
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build'em up with worn-out tools;
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings,
And never breathe a word about your loss:
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings---nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much:
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it! - Kipling 
143
« on: May 10, 2011, 02:33:36 PM »
Do you guys give money to street beggars?
I, myself, find it very difficult to say "No" to them, so, I always end up throwing a few bucks. Eventhough, I know, majority of them spend it on alcohol/drugs. Some of them are very capable of finding jobs and working like the rest of us.
What do you guys do/think? Share your thoughts.
144
« on: May 06, 2011, 12:33:15 AM »
So, what are some of the things you'd like to accomplish in your life? What are your goals? How are you planning on accomplishing them?
-Would love to hear everyone's feed back. :)
145
« on: May 05, 2011, 02:46:54 PM »
(this may be a repeat - not sure)
These are from a book called ‘Disorder in the American Courts’ and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.
__________________________________________
ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
___________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
_________________________ ___________
ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: He’s twenty, much like your IQ.
___________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you ****ting me?
_________________________________________
ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Getting laid
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
W ITNESS : Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Take a guess.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I’m going with male.
_____________________________________
ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
______________________________________
ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.
_________________________________________
ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral.
_________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?
______________________________________
And the best for last:
ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.
146
« on: May 03, 2011, 03:49:05 PM »
Dharmendra: Thank you for calliiiiingg. . .
Customer: I need help
Dharmendra: main aa raaha hoon maa…
Customer: I am unable to use your product… its a waste and worthless
Dharmendra: Kutte mein tera khoon peejaaonga...
Customer: What!!! I need your manager
Dharmendra: (To his manager) Manager is customer ke saamne nahi naachna
Shatru : Aaaaaiiin Kis ullllu ke patthe ne call kiya hai…
Customer : How dare you speak like that
Shatru : Khaaaamoshhh
:D: :D: :D: :D:
147
« on: May 03, 2011, 02:28:29 PM »
148
« on: May 02, 2011, 02:29:11 PM »
:hehe:
149
« on: May 02, 2011, 09:56:33 AM »
College - an institution for education
Collage - A form of art in which various materials such as photographs and pieces of paper or fabric are arranged and stuck to a backing.
150
« on: May 01, 2011, 11:51:09 PM »
I just had to ask. I would be surprised if there are any punjabi girls who don't know how to cook.
151
« on: April 26, 2011, 11:06:42 AM »
Ashfaq, Gill Nu: Yaar Sadi Teacher Kehndi Ki Majj Da Dudh Peen Naal Dimaag Tej Hunda eh….
Gill: Gapp Mardi eh, Je Aa Gall Hundi Ta Apna Katta Scientist Lageya Hunda….
152
« on: April 26, 2011, 10:59:16 AM »
Sandhu Roopal De Piche Kafi Der Ton Ja Reha Si….
Roopal: Ve Tenu Samaj Nai Aundi, Teri Maut Tenu Ajj Bula Rahi, Tenu
Darr Nai Lagda Meri Bebe Vi Piche-Piche Aa Rahi….
Sandhu: Asin Aashiq Ha Khandaani, Sade Bajurg Vi Apna farz Nibha Rahe
Ne, Fikar Na Kar Teri Bebe Piche Sade Bapu Hori Vi Aa Rahe Ne….
153
« on: April 26, 2011, 10:56:31 AM »
╬нƹ ѕσυℓ мα╬ƹ™ - Kal Sada Admin (GS) Khoo Wich Dig Gaya Te Jorjor Naal Cheeka Maran Lag Pea...
Insane (Pendu) - Hun Kiwe Aa…?
╬нƹ ѕσυℓ мα╬ƹ™ - Theek Hi Houga, Kal Di Khu Cho Koi Awaaz Ta Ayi Nai….
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Pendu te Soulmate Jurassic Park Film Wekh Rahe si...
PENDU Dinasour Vekh Ke Kursi Piche Lukk Gaya,
Naal Baitha Soulmate Boleya: Oye Amliya, Oh Aa Ta Film Aa...
PENDU: Apa Nu Ta Pata Par Dinasour Nu Ta Nai Pata….
154
« on: April 24, 2011, 05:52:49 AM »
Let me know what the hell I was banned for from the chat by yamla and there better be good damn reason, other than you're "unbanned"
155
« on: April 23, 2011, 03:43:52 PM »
they've got some gangsta rides :D: :D: :D:
156
« on: April 19, 2011, 04:16:57 PM »
1. The maker doesn't want it; the buyer doesn't use it; and the user doesn't even see it. What is it?
2. There is one word in the English language that is always pronounced incorrectly. What is it?
3. What is it that goes up and goes down but does not move?
4. Before Mount Everest was discovered, what was the highest mountain on Earth?
5. What is one thing that all wise men, regardless of their religion or politics, agree is between heaven and earth?
6. How could you rearrange the letters in the words "new door" to make one word? Note: There is only one correct answer.
7. Which is correct to say, "The yolk of the egg *are* white" or "The yolk of the egg *is* white"?
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ANSWERS:
1. Coffin.
2. incorrectly.
3. Temperature.
4. Mount Everest.
5. The word "and".
6. "new door" = "one word".
7. Neither, the yolk of the egg is yellow.
157
« on: April 15, 2011, 11:28:00 AM »
We have a lot of different customs that play a significant role in punjabi weddings. Can we make a list of them and provide a little bit of the history behind them?! For example: The groom has wears a "sehra" (or at least used to) - what's the history behing it? Another one, bhabhi surmaa paundi groom de (I think it's the bhabhi : I'm a bit rusti on these things :pagel:)
158
« on: April 08, 2011, 12:05:24 AM »
Is there a way to turn off the new message pop-up?
I find it extremely annoying! /:(
159
« on: March 24, 2011, 01:39:24 PM »
Have you guys ever sneezed and coughed at the same time? How often do you do it? When was the last time it occured?
- mine was yesterday, has happened 2 times so far :hehe:
160
« on: March 24, 2011, 12:41:53 PM »
Happy Birthday Sweetie :hug: hun ta viah karala vaalhi umar ho gayi aa, ewi shadda na reh jayi :hehe: On your birthday I wish you much pleasure and joy; I hope all of your wishes come true. May each hour and minute be filled with delight, And your birthday be perfect for you. :hug: :hug: :hug: http://punjabijanta.com/profile/Bulletiya_moge_wala/
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