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Author Topic: Religion - A Mess  (Read 4187 times)

Offline Qainaat

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Re: Religion - A Mess
« Reply #20 on: March 24, 2014, 04:18:15 PM »
Hey Varun.

Sorry to hear about this man.

Whatever you said is true, but also false at the same time.
Because what religion would mean to a person may not mean the same to another.Everybody is different and they relate themselves to their own religions in different ways.

It's like everyone has a different connection with god, some fear him for being punished, some consider god as their friend and so on.This difference in perception is because everyone is different.

That's really good and sincere of you if wanted to change your religion to her religion, I respect your feelings, but this is definitely not something I would ever suggest to anyone.Never change your religion just for the sake of satisfying your loved one, because you're giving up your own values just so that you could share a life with the one you love, and this might cause you to regret later on in life, this might even upset your parents who have been there for you always.Converting to a religion is legitimate when your own soul is attracted to its religious philosophy, mentality and its way of life and you're deeply convinced that you really "need" to take this on, otherwise not !

This is life man, it hits you hard sometimes.You just need to detach yourself from your emotions for a while, and think in a rational way about what has happened and conclude a meaning from it and let it guide you further.Don't spend too much time judging and holding grudges within because it'll only make it worse.

What you've experienced is something which many others have gone through.I know some Sikh guys who couldn't marry the girl because the family didn't agree because they were Hindu.

In the end it is not the religion to be blamed at all.
Some might place more importance upon their religion than a love relationship and some may not.
It all depends upon the kind of connection they have with their religion, because religion is very personal, and one just needs to respect the other person's perspective regardless of whatever religion they come from.
In this case neither of you (you and the girl) are wrong in my view, it's just a difference of value system and both should just understand and respect that, and move on.I know this sounds not so easy, but I'm, sure you'll cope up and will be fine.

I hope you get my point.I can understand the kind of dilemma you must be going through.
Take this as a life lesson, this will toughen you up and will teach how to manage your emotions better, and you'll be a better judge next time before you fall for somebody because you wouldn't let emotions come before wisdom.
Don't belittle yourself, always look towards the brighter side and hope for the best, may be one day you will find your perfect soul mate, or who knows your parents might find you the perfect one someday.
You're still young man ;) lol.

Life has a lot to offer than just love.Start focusing on the things you want from life, make a list, plan for it and work over it.Channelize this pain into something that will sharpen your focus on being more successful in life rather than letting this pain take control of you and do nothing good to you.
Make that inner shift in yourself, and just follow your dreams.

Keep your chin up and walk tall.
All the best bruv.

Feel free to pm me anytime.
Take care :)

^^^ I couldnt agree more..

Hii Varun.. Its been a long time :) sad to hear your story but I'm sure you are strong enough to deal with it

I was thinking not to post a comment in this topic but then I thought ke agar aapne apna ye masla ek forum pe share kiya hi hai toh iska matlab yahi huwa ke you would like to hear our opinion and you wont mind to discuss this matter..

As I wrote before hum Ryder ki baat se agree karte hain and that's why I wont repeat what he said.. But I would like to add someting to it.. See I can understand that you're hurt at the moment but I think it's wrong to blame a religion for it.. Pehli baat toh ye ke aapne khud bola hai ke ap apna religion change karne ko bhi ready the just to get married to her.. Dont you think ke apna religion change karne ke liye ye reason wrong hai? This means ke you have nothing to do with her religion nor do you accept it by heart.. Dukh ki baat hai ke aj kal hum apne religion ko itna important nahi samajhte jitna ke apne mohabbat ke rishte ko samajhte hain..

It's true that life would have been easy if people ignored all this stuff and just got married with the one they loved.. But blaming a religion is a bit too much..

Mazhab ek aisi cheez hai joh insaan ki pedaish ke saath hi uske saath jhur jaati hai.. And that's why I wont blame parents for these things..
Jitni mehnat parents ki lagaay hoti hai ek bache main.. Usko shuru se hi apne religion ki choti choti cheez sikhaane main.. agar utni mehnat aapne kisi bhi cheez main lagaay ho and later on woh apki sikhaay huwi cheez ke bilqul hi koi opposite cheez karne lage toh afsoos toh hoga na? Aur baat sirf apki nahi aane wali naslon ki bhi hoti hai.. Jab apne kisi religion ko apnaya hi sirf isliye hoga ke apki shadi ho sake toh phir ap apne aane walon bachon ko kaise woh religion sikha sakho ge?

I wont say its wrong to love someone who belongs to another religion.. Maybe love is something which is beyond these things.. Pyar karo lekin ye umeed na rakho ke usko paana hi paana hai.. Pyar toh dil se hota hai na? Toh agar ap us shaqs ko duniya ki nazar main (shadi kar ke) pa nahi sake toh that shouldnt matter.. Dil se kisi ke liye pyar khatam toh nahi ho jata..

At times things happen to teach you something.. Hum sab toh apna aj dhek kar apne faisle karte hain lekin khuda humara aane wala kal dhek kar humare liye faisle karta hai.. Just pray for that girl to be happy in life with or without you.. Is sab ko apni kamzoori nahi apni takat banao.. Everything is gonna be fine!!











 

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Re: Religion - A Mess
« Reply #20 on: March 24, 2014, 04:18:15 PM »

Offline Varun....

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Re: Religion - A Mess
« Reply #21 on: March 24, 2014, 05:45:25 PM »
HI QAINAAT..
As I wrote before hum Ryder ki baat se agree karte hain and that's why I wont repeat what he said.. But I would like to add someting to it.. See I can understand that you're hurt at the moment but I think it's wrong to blame a religion for it.. Pehli baat toh ye ke aapne khud bola hai ke ap apna religion change karne ko bhi ready the just to get married to her.. Dont you think ke apna religion change karne ke liye ye reason wrong hai?This means ke you have nothing to do with her religion nor do you accept it by heart.. Dukh ki baat hai ke aj kal hum apne religion ko itna important nahi samajhte jitna ke apne mohabbat ke rishte ko samajhte hain..

I DONT GIVE IMPORTANCE.. SO IT DOESNT MATTER KOI BHI REASON HO. I ACCEPT 'HER' BY HEART REST I DONT CARE. THE ONLY THING I GIVE IMPORTANCE TO IS A 'HUMAN BEING'. I HAVE JUST REMOVED THE RELIGION NAME LAYER FROM MY LIFE. I SEE EVERYONE IN A SINGLE RELIGION OF HUMANITY. AND OFFCOURSE THERE IS NOTHING BIGGER THAN LOVE. ITS LOVE WHO UNITE EVERYONE TOGETHER.    
MEANS I WAS BLAMING RELIGION FOR ONLY ONE REASON PEOPLE MAKE IT A MATTER OF FIGHT. AND I WAS RITE ABOUT THAT. PEOPLE DO FIGHT. YOU ALL STARTED SHOWING RELIGION IMPORTANCE IN SUCH A WAY THAT I AM BLAMING RELIGION FOR ALL THE BAD THINGS HAPPENING IN THIS WORLD.
   
It's true that life would have been easy if people ignored all this stuff and just got married with the one they loved.. But blaming a religion is a bit too much..
ACHA MERI EK SIMPLE SI BAAT KA ANSWER DENA.. ABOVE I SAID PEOPLE USING RELIGION A MATTER OF FIGHT OR YOU CAN SAY FOR REJECTING.. M RIGHT OR NOT? JUST YES OR NO.

Mazhab ek aisi cheez hai joh insaan ki pedaish ke saath hi uske saath jhur jaati hai.. And that's why I wont blame parents for these things..
Jitni mehnat parents ki lagaay hoti hai ek bache main.. Usko shuru se hi apne religion ki choti choti cheez sikhaane main.. agar utni mehnat aapne kisi bhi cheez main lagaay ho and later on woh apki sikhaay huwi cheez ke bilqul hi koi opposite cheez karne lage toh afsoos toh hoga na? Aur baat sirf apki nahi aane wali naslon ki bhi hoti hai.. Jab apne kisi religion ko apnaya hi sirf isliye hoga ke apki shadi ho sake toh phir ap apne aane walon bachon ko kaise woh religion sikha sakho ge?
TUMAARA MATLAB CHAHE KUCH BI SIKHAYA HO PAR KABI PARENTS KO OPPOSE MAT KARNA. BAAP BETE KO GALAT SIKHAYEGA FIR WO APNE BACHON KO GALAT SIKHAYENGE OR CHAIN CHALTI RAHEGI. JISKO SIKHANA HAI SIKHAYE PAR SAHI SIKHAYE.

FRANKLY SPEAKING, MUJE TO NHI SIKHANA APNE BACHON KO YE RELIGION YE SAB. USE BUS SAHI OR GALAT KA FARK SAMJHANA HAI.

I wont say its wrong to love someone who belongs to another religion.. Maybe love is something which is beyond these things.. Pyar karo lekin ye umeed na rakho ke usko paana hi paana hai.. Pyar toh dil se hota hai na? Toh agar ap us shaqs ko duniya ki nazar main (shadi kar ke) pa nahi sake toh that shouldnt matter.. Dil se kisi ke liye pyar khatam toh nahi ho jata..
I KNOW.. ITS RITE.. MENE TO YAHI SOCH KE KIYA THA.. PAR JAB HO JATA HAI NA TAB USE KHONE KA MANN NHI KARTA HAI..ESA LAGTA HAI AGAR WO HUMESA HAMARE PAAS RAHE TO LIFE KITNI ACHI HO JAEGI. AUR KISI CHIJ KO KHONE KA DUKH TUM ACHI TARAH JANTI HO..SORRY BUT SOMETIMES IT MATTERS..

SO BETTER WE STOP DISCUSSION ANYMORE AND YOU GUYS CONTINUE WITH YOUR RELIGION THING. ITS REALLY HARD TO CHANGE SOMEONE'S MIND WHEN THE THING IS RELATED TO RELIGION IRRESPECTIVE OF RIGHT OR WRONG. AND THAT TOO IF SOMEONE IS A KEEN LOVER OF RELIGION.
 
BYE .TC. EVEYRONE.


...
AUR HAAN MERE SATH JO HUA USKA DUKH HAI MUJE ..
PAR ISKA MATLAB YE NHI KI ME DRINK KARKE BAITHA HUA OR KUCH BHI LIKHE JAA RAHA HU. JO LIKHA HAI BHUT SOCH SAMAJ KAR LIKHA HAI..

 

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