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Topics - ravi_sandhu
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281
« on: November 01, 2007, 01:02:18 AM »
Kash koi "exam result" ka insurance kara deta
to har exam ke pehle premium bharwa deta.
Pass hota to thik warna insurance claim karwa leta.
282
« on: November 01, 2007, 12:51:36 AM »
Girls problems:
phone mat karo dear,
mom hai near,
dad se lagta hai fear,
Baat hoti nahi clear,
isliye sms karo dear,
without fear and very clear.
283
« on: November 01, 2007, 12:36:39 AM »
Tumko dekh kar aisa lagta hai ki aadmi pehele bandar tha,
Dekho gussa mat hona warna lagega ki aadmi aaj bhi bandar hai.
284
« on: November 01, 2007, 12:32:00 AM »
Mein ne chand ko dekha to aap nazar aye
Mein ne taroon ko dekha to aap nazar aye
Mein ne phoolon ko dekha to aap nazar aye
Plz aap zara side par hona takay hmein kuch aur nazar aye.
285
« on: November 01, 2007, 12:25:40 AM »
Haseen tum ho to buray hum b nahi..
Mehlon mein tum ho to sarkon pe hum b nahi..
Dosti kar k kehtay ho BUSY ho?
Kaan khol k sun lo FARIG hum b nahi..!
286
« on: November 01, 2007, 12:18:56 AM »
Aap kya jano hum tumhe kitna yaad karte hai,
Harpal tumhari faryad karte hai,
Roz khat likhte hai Cartoon network ko,
Aap ko dikhane ki mang karte hai....
287
« on: November 01, 2007, 12:13:31 AM »
Kal jab mile the.
To dil mein hua ek sound.
Aur aaj mile to kehete hain
Your file not found!
Jo muddat se hota aaya hai,
Woh repeat kar doonga,
Tu na mili to apni zindagi,
Ctrl+alt+delete kar doonga.
288
« on: November 01, 2007, 12:10:42 AM »
ROZ logo se tere Pange honge,
ROZ tere ghar me dange honge,
AGAR mujhe SMS nahi kiya to yaad rakhna,
TUMHRE 12 bacheche honge or sare LAFANGE honge..
289
« on: November 01, 2007, 12:07:40 AM »
Duniya buri ho sakti hae aap nahi
Duniya bewafa ho sakti hae aap nahi
Duniya gandi ho sakti hae aap nahi
Kuttay ki dum sedhi ho sakti hae aap nahi.
290
« on: November 01, 2007, 12:05:01 AM »
Before Marriage
takdir hai magar kismat nahi khulti
tajmahal banana chahata hoon
lekin mumtaz nahi milti
After Marriage
takdir hai magar kismat nahi khulti
tajmahal banana chahata hoon
lekin mumtaz nahi marti.
291
« on: October 31, 2007, 05:42:53 PM »
1: VELLY_PUTT_SARDARA_DE
2: PRIVATE
3. JAZZ
4. JATT 01
5. SERIALKISSER
6. HATHYAR
7: RAVI_SANDHU
8. SARDAR
9: PUNJABIROCKS
10: PUNJABEE
11: JATT_GREAT444
12: KANT_JATT
13. ROM
14. KANPURIA
15: VELLY_JATT
16: DIL_JANI
TUSI SAB APNI KEEMTI VOTE DE K EHNA VICHO KISE IK NU J4C DA GREAT KANJAR BNA SAKDE OO
292
« on: October 31, 2007, 05:08:38 PM »
Nazar to mila sake,
Per zaban ko hila na sake,
Laakh chaha humne,
Phir bhi tum ko bhula na sake.
293
« on: October 31, 2007, 05:02:36 PM »
Two guys were picked up by the cops for smoking dope and appeared in court before the judge.
The judge said, "You seem like nice young men, and I'd like to give you a second chance rather than jail time. I want you to go out this weekend and try to show others the evils of drug use and pursuade them to give up drugs forever. I'll see you back in court Monday."
Monday, the two guys were in court, and the judge said to the first one, "How did you do over the weekend?"
"Well, your honor, I persuaded 17 people to give up drugs forever." "17 people? That's wonderful. What did you tell them?"
"I used a diagram, your honor. I drew two circles like this: O o
and told them this (the big circle) is your brain before drugs and this (small circle) is your brain after drugs."
"That's admirable," said the judge. "And you, how did you do?" (to the 2nd guy)
"Well, your honor, I persuaded 156 people to give up drugs forever."
"156 people! That's amazing! How did you manage to do that!"
"Well, I used the same two circles. I pointed to the small circle and told them, 'This is your asshole before prison...."
294
« on: October 31, 2007, 04:59:33 PM »
Why do women have smaller feet than men?
So they can stand closer to the kitchen sink.
295
« on: October 31, 2007, 04:57:00 PM »
There is a man who goes out drinking all the time and comes home very later every night.
So one night his wife decides to teach him a lesson. She dresses up like Satan, and decides to hide in the dark, and scare him when he gets home.
The man comes home, and his wife jumps out and screams in his face.
He just looks at her and says, ''You don't scare me I am married to your sister!'''
296
« on: October 31, 2007, 04:54:23 PM »
Upon arriving home in eager anticipation of a leisurely evening, the husband was met at the door by his sobbing wife.
Tearfully she explained, "It's the pharmacist - he insulted me terribly this morning on the phone."
Immediately, the husband drove downtown to accuse the pharmacist and demand an apology.
Before he could say more than a word or two, the pharmacist told him, "Now, just a minute - listen to my side of it.
This morning the alarm failed to go off, so I was late getting up.
I went without breakfast and hurried out to the car, but I'll be damned if I didn't lock the house with both house and car keys inside.
I had to break a window to get my keys. Driving a little too fast, I got a speeding ticket. Then, about three blocks from the store I had a flat tire.
When I finally got to the store, there was a bunch of people waiting for me to open up.
I got the store opened and started waiting on these people, and all the time the darn phone was ringing its head off.
Then I had to break a roll of nickels against the cash register drawer to make change, and they spilled all over the floor.
I got down on my hands and knees to pick up the nickels - the phone is till ringing - when I came up I cracked my head on the open cash drawer, which made me stagger back against a showcase with a bunch of perfume bottles on it, and half of them hit the floor and broke.
The phone is still ringing with no let up, I finally got back to answer it."
The pharmacist continues, "It was your wife - she wanted to know how to use a rectal thermometer. Well, Mister, I TOLD HER!!!"
297
« on: October 31, 2007, 04:51:47 PM »
The CIA had an opening for an assassin.
After all of the background checks, interviews, and testing were done there were three finalists, two men and a woman.
For the final test, the CIA agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.
"We must know that you will follow your instructions, no matter what the circumstances.
Inside of this room, you will find your wife sitting in a chair, Kill Her!!!"
The man said, "You can't be serious. I could never shoot my wife."
The agent said, "Then you're not the right man for this job."
The second man was given the same instructions.
He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about five minutes. Then the man came out with tears in his eyes. "I tried, but I can't kill my wife."
The agent said, "You don't have what it takes, Take your wife and go home."
Finally, it was the woman's turn.
She was given the same instructions, to kill her husband.
She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one shot after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls.
After a few minutes, all was quiet.
The door opened slowly and there stood the woman.
She wiped the sweat from her brow and said, "The darn gun was loaded with blanks! I had to beat him to death with the chair."
298
« on: October 31, 2007, 04:48:35 PM »
It was this little girl's first day of school, and the teacher asked her what her name was.
She replied, "Happy Butt."
The teacher said, "Honey I don't think that's your name. You need to go to the principal's office and get this straightened out."
So she went to the principal's office and he asked, "What's your name?"
And the little girl said, "Happy Butt."
The principal called the girl's mother to get this straightened out once and for all.
After getting off the phone, he looked at the little girl and said, "Honey, your name is Gladys, not Happy Butt."
The girl then exclaimed, "Glad Ass, Happy Butt, what's the difference?"
299
« on: October 31, 2007, 04:46:03 PM »
A couple was celebrating their golden wedding anniversary.
Their domestic tranquility had long been the talk of the town. A local newspaper reporter was inquiring as to the secret of their long and happy marriage.
"Well, it dates back to our honeymoon," explained the man. "We visited the Grand Canyon and took a trip down to the bottom on the canyon by pack mule.
We hadn't gone too far when my wife's mule stumbled. My wife quietly said, 'That's once.'
We proceeded a little further and the mule stumbled again.
Once more my wife quietly said,
'That's twice.'
We hadn't gone a half-mile when the mule stumbled the third time.
My wife quietly removed a revolver from her pocket and shot the mule dead.
I started to protest over her treatment of the mule when she looked at me and quietly said, 'That's once.'"
300
« on: October 31, 2007, 04:43:11 PM »
Two elderly women were out driving in a large car, both women barely large enough to see over the dashboard.
As they cruised along, they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red, but they just went right on through.
The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself, "I must be losing it, I could have sworn we just went through a red light."
After a few more minutes, they came to another intersection, the light was red, and again they went right through.
This time, the passenger was almost sure that the light had been red, but was also concerned that she might be seeing things.
She was getting nervous, and decided to pay very close attention.
At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was definitely red, and they went right through it.
She turned to the other woman and said, "Mildred! Did you know we just ran through three red lights in a row? You could have killed us!"
Mildred turned to her and said,
"Oh my goodness! Am I driving?"
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