Show Posts

A lawyer and a senior citizen are sitting next to each other on a long flight. The lawyer is thinking that seniors are so dumb that he could get one over on them easy. So the lawyer asks if the senior would like to play a fun game. The senior is tired and just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and tries to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists, saying that the game is a lot of fun. "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me only $5. Then you ask me one, and if I don't know the answer, I will pay you $500," he says. This catches the senior's attention and to keep the lawyer quiet, he agrees to play the game. The lawyer asks the first question. 'What's the distance from the Earth to the Moon?' The senior doesn't say a word, but reaches into his pocket, pulls out a five-dollar bill, and hands it to the lawyer. Now it's the senior's turn. He asks the lawyer, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down with four?" The lawyer uses his laptop and searches all references he could find on the Net. He sends e-mails to all the smart friends he knows; all to no avail. After an hour of searching, he finally gives up. He wakes the senior and hands him $500. The senior pockets the $500 and goes right back to sleep. The lawyer is going nuts not knowing the answer. He wakes the senior up and asks, "Well, so what goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four?" The senior reaches into his pocket, hands the lawyer $5 and goes back to sleep.

:rockon: :rockon: :rockon: :D: :D: :D: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

1589

Jokes Majaak / The poor wifey!

« on: May 20, 2011, 01:57:59 PM »

An Illinois man left Chicago for a vacation in Florida. His wife was on a business trip and was planning to meet him there the next day. When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick email. Unable to find the scrap of paper on which he had written her email address, he did his best to type it in from memory. Unfortunately, he missed one letter, and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher's wife whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her email, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor dead. At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen: Dearest Wife, Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Your Loving Husband.

P.S. Sure is hot down here.

:D: :D: :D: :D: :D:

1590

Jokes Majaak / Hold on sweetie!

« on: May 20, 2011, 01:50:34 PM »

Some people grow old gracefully, while others fight and scratch the whole way. Daniel's wife, refusing to give in to growing old, goes out and buys a new line of expensive cosmetics guaranteed to make her look years younger. After a lengthy sitting before the mirror applying the "miracle" products, she asks her husband: "Darling, honestly, if you didn't know me, what age would you say I am?" Looking her over carefully, Daniel replies: "Judging from your skin, 20, your hair, 18, and your figure, 25." "Oh, you flatterer!" she gushes: "That's so nice of you to say that!" "Whoa, hold on there, sweetie," Daniel interrupts: "I haven't added them up yet!" :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

1591

Jokes Majaak / Re: It's started

« on: May 20, 2011, 01:46:18 PM »

Quote from: Ķιℓℓα Ķαuя on May 20, 2011, 01:38:05 PM

oda ladoooo kitho paste kari janda eh sab :hehe:

I'll leave ya in the dark. :blink:

1592

Jokes Majaak / The poor tailor!

« on: May 20, 2011, 01:43:20 PM »

Harry was a poor tailor whose shop was next door a 2 Star Restaurant. Every day for lunch, Harry would eat his black bread and herring in the small garden at the back of his shop. He would always smell the wonderful odours emanating from the next door restaurant's kitchen. One day, the restaurant sent Harry an invoice. Harry went to see the manager to ask why. The manager replied, "You’re enjoying my food, so you should pay for it." Harry refused to pay and the restaurant sued him. At the hearing, the judge asked the restaurant to present their side of the story. They said, "Every day, this man comes and sits near our kitchen and visibly smells our food whilst eating his. We are obviously adding value to his cheap food and we deserve to be recompensed for it." The judge then asked Harry, "And what do you have to say about that?" Harry said nothing but stuck his hand in his pocket and rattled around the coins he had inside. The judge asked him, "What’s the meaning of that?" Harry replied, "I am paying for the smell of his food with the sound of my money." :blink:

1593

Jokes Majaak / It's started

« on: May 20, 2011, 01:36:02 PM »

A man came home from an exhausting day at work, plopped down on the couch in front of the television, and told his wife: "Get me a beer before it starts!" The wife sighed and got him a beer. Ten minutes later, he said: "Get me another beer before it starts!" She looked cross, but fetched another beer and slammed it down next to him. He finished that beer and a few minutes later said: "Quick, get me another beer, it's going to start any minute!" The wife was furious. "Is that all you're going to do tonight! Drink beer and sit in front of that TV! You're nothing but a lazy, drunken, fat slob and furthermore..." The man sighed and said: "It's started." :D: :D:

1594