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Messages - SonnenKinder
9241
« on: November 09, 2009, 03:49:27 PM »
Law of queue: If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now.
Law of the Telephone: When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged tone.
Law of Mechanical Repair: After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.
Law of the Workshop: Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
Law of the Alibi: If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tyre, the next morning you will have a flat tyre.
Bath THEOREM: When the body is immersed in water, the telephone rings
LAW OF ENCOUNTERS: The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
LAW of the RESULT: When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will!
LAW OF BIOMECHANICS: The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
THEATRE RULE: People with the seats at the furthest from the aisle arrive last.
LAW OF COFFEE: As soon as you sit down for a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.
9242
« on: November 09, 2009, 07:09:09 AM »
Man discovered weapons, invented hunting.
Woman discovered hunting, invented furs.
Man discovered colors, invented painting.
Woman discovered painting, invented make-up.
Man discovered speech, invented conversation.
Woman discovered conversation, invented gossip.
Man discovered agriculture, invented food.
Woman discovered food, invented diet.
Man discovered friendship, invented love.
Woman discovered love, invented marriage.
Man discovered trade, invented money.
Woman discovered money, man has never recovered
9243
« on: November 09, 2009, 07:03:43 AM »
Before the marriage:
He: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.
She: Do you want me to leave?
He: NO! Don't even think about it.
She: Do you love me?
He: Of course!
She: Have you ever cheated on me?
He: NO! Why you even asking?
She: Will you kiss me?
He: Yes!
She: Will you hit me?
He: No way! I'm not such kind of person!
She: Can I trust you?
He: Yes.
Now after the marriage you can read it from below to up !!!!
9244
« on: November 09, 2009, 06:58:45 AM »
Advertisement In A Long Island Shop: Guitar, for sale....... cheap...........no strings attached.
Ad.. In Hospital Waiting Room: Smoking Helps You Lose Weight ... One Lung At A Time!
Seen on a bulletin board: Success Is Relative. More The Success, More The Relatives.
When I Read About The Evils Of Drinking...I Gave Up Reading.
My Grandfather Is Eighty And Still Doesn't Need Glasses... He Drinks Straight Out Of The Bottle.
You Know Your kids Have Grown Up When: Your Daughter Begins To Put On Lipstick.. Or Your Son Starts To Wipe It Off.
Sign In A Bar: "Those Of You Who Are Drinking To Forget, Please Pay In Advance."
Sign In Driving School: If Your Wife Wants To Learn To Drive, Don't Stand In Her Way.
Behind Every Great Man, There Is A Surprised Woman.
The Reason Men Lie Is Because Women Ask So Many Questions.
Getting Caught Is The Mother Of Invention.
Laugh And The World Laughs With You, Snore And You sleep Alone.
The Surest Sign That Intelligent Life Exists Elsewhere In The Universe Is The Fact That It Has Never Tried To Contact Us.
Sign At A Barber's Saloon In Detroit: We Need Your Heads To Run Our Business.
A Traffic Slogan: Don't Let Your Kids Drive If They are Not Old Enough Or Else They Will Never Be.
Sign In A Restaurant: All Drinking Water In This Establishment Has Been Personally Passed By The Manager.
Sign On A Famous Beauty Parlor Window: Don't Whistle At The Girls Going Out From Here. She May Be Your Grandmother !
9245
« on: November 09, 2009, 06:52:28 AM »
Our communication - Wireless
Our dress - Topless
Our telephone - Cordless
Our cooking - Fireless
Our youth - Jobless
Our food - Fatless
Our labour - Effortless
Our conduct - Worthless
Our relation - Loveless
Our attitude - Careless
Our feelings - Heartless
Our politics - Shameless
Our education - Valueless
Our follies - Countless
Our arguments - Baseless
Our Job - Thankless
Our Boss - Brainless
Our Salary - Very less
9246
« on: November 09, 2009, 06:31:20 AM »
1.MANAGEMENT THOUGHT.
“Intelligence is like an underwear.
It is important that you have it,
but not necessary that you show it........”
2.CREATION
God may have created man before woman,
but there’s always a rough draft before the masterpiece ...
3. THE HUMAN BRAIN
The human brain is most outstanding thing -
it functions 24hrs 365 days,
right from the time u r born until u fall in love.
4.IF YOUR DOG IS BARKING
If your dog is barking at the back door and your
wife yelling at the frontdoor,
who do you let in first?
The Dog of course...at least he'll shut up after u
let him in!
5.WIFE RUNNING AFTER GARBAGE TRUCK
My wife ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too
late for the garbage?"
Following her down the street I yelled, "No, jump in."
6.HOLD YOUR WIFE'S HAND
i always hold my wife's hand. If I let go, she shops
7.ASKED WIFE
I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our
anniversary?" She said,"Somewhere I have never been!"
I told her,"How about the kitchen?"
8.DO YOU OPEN DOOR FOR WIFE?
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife,
you can be sure of one thing :
either the car is new or the wife.
9.LOVE IS BLIND
Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.
10.WHEN A NEWLY MARRIED
When a newly married couple smiles, everyone knows
why.
When a ten-year married couple smiles, everyone
wonders why.
11.MARRIAGE IS A
Marriage is a three-ring circus:
--engagement ring
---wedding ring
---suffering
12.A MAN WITHOUT A WOMAN
"A man without a woman is like a fish without a
bicycle."
13.BACHELORS KNOW MORE
Bachelors know more about women than married men;
if they didn't, they'd be married too.
14.A PSHYIATRIST
A psychiatrist is a person who will give you
expensive answers that your
wife will give you for free.
15.I DONT WORRY
I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for
two years.
MORE IN 2ND INSTALLMENT :happy:
9247
« on: November 09, 2009, 06:01:05 AM »
Bubba was bragging to his boss one day, "You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them."
Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff, "OK, Bubba how about Tom Cruise?"
"Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it. "
So Bubba and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door, and sure enough, Tom Cruise, shouts, "Bubba! Great to see you! You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!"
Although impressed, Bubba's boss is still skeptical. After they leave Cruise's house, he tells Bubba that he thinks Bubba's knowing Cruise was just lucky.
"No, no, just name anyone else," Bubba says.
"President Clinton," his boss quickly retorts.
"Yes," Bubba says, "I know him, let's fly out to Washington."
And off they go. At the White House, Clinton spots Bubba on the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, "Bubba, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee first and catch up."
Well, the boss is very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced. After they leave the White house grounds, he expresses his doubts to Bubba, who again implores him to name anyone else.
"The Pope," his boss replies.
"Sure!" says Bubba. "My folks are from Poland, and I've known the Pope a long time."
So off they fly to Rome. Bubba and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Bubba says, "This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope."
And he disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican. Sure enough, half an hour later Bubba emerges with the Pope on the balcony.
But by the time Bubba returns, he finds that his boss has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics. Working his way to his boss' side, Bubba asks him, "What happened?"
His boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said, "Who's that on the balcony with Bubba?'
9248
« on: November 08, 2009, 07:56:24 PM »
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer.
When asked to define great, he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"
He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.
 :happy:
9249
« on: November 08, 2009, 07:51:03 PM »
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
yaar koi thankyou te b click kar diya karo :angr:
9250
« on: November 08, 2009, 07:49:08 PM »
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
+1 for making us all laugh, Thank You :happy:
mah pleasure buddy :happy:
9251
« on: November 08, 2009, 07:47:47 PM »
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
yep Get the my bills :lol: :lol: :lol:
hahaha drop da idea of getting married
9252
« on: November 08, 2009, 07:45:03 PM »
A man approached a very beautiful woman in a Mall and said: "I have lost my wife here at this mall. Can you talk to me for a couple of minutes?"
The woman looked puzzled. "Why talk to me?" she asked.
The man answered: "Because every time I talk to a woman as beautiful as you, my wife appears out of nowhere....."
9253
« on: November 08, 2009, 07:40:51 PM »
1.My wife dresses to kill. She also cooks the same way.
2.My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
3.A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
4.I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, "There was water in the carburetor." I asked her, "Where's the car?" She replied," In the lake."
5.The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
6.After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You know, I was a fool when I married you." The husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn't notice."
7.Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.
8.A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" The father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
9.Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; then it was too late.
10.It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer.
11.Losing a wife can be very hard. In my case, it was almost impossible.
12.A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
9254
« on: November 08, 2009, 07:15:21 PM »
OYE AY KI C
YAAR :dnk: :dnk: :dnk: :dnk:
ENGREJI KITHOO P[ENI PALE SADE :dnk: :dnk: :dnk:
punjabi da jawab ni
9255
« on: November 08, 2009, 07:13:35 PM »
Looks like the dream came true :happy:
yea right. but imagine the hardwork put behind those dreams to make them come true. You know man all gr8 men were dreamers. Like Albert Einstein said," if u wont dream, how wud u make em come true."
9256
« on: November 08, 2009, 07:10:51 PM »
hahhaha that's so wrong!
mebbe but MJ's music made no sense to me. now don call me stupid coz i don like his music :happy:
9257
« on: November 08, 2009, 07:05:57 PM »
9258
« on: November 08, 2009, 07:03:14 PM »
1.My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he was God and I didn't.
2.I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.
3.I used to have a handle on lif10.e, but it broke.
4.Don't take life too seriously; No one gets out alive.
5.You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me
6.Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
7.I'm not a complete idiot; Some parts are missing.
8.Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.
9.God must love stupid people; He made so many.
10.Being "over the hill" is much better than being under it!
11.A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three thousand times the memory.
12.Ham and eggs. A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment for a pig.
13.I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on.
9259
« on: November 08, 2009, 06:32:52 PM »
"As the mother began to smile, the child added, "For those of you who are pissed off about the TWO HOUR delay, please see the bitch in the kitchen." "'
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :happy:
mae hundi, mundey de latt paer tuttey hunde... :happy:
hun punjabia wali gal kita
9260
« on: November 08, 2009, 06:31:27 PM »
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