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Topics - SonnenKinder
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221
« on: February 26, 2010, 08:05:12 PM »
Hungry? What would you like: pizza from the local Domino's (30 minute delivery) or a fresh, hot meal from home? Most managers don't have a choice. It's either a packed lunch or junk food grabbed from a fast food outlet. Unless you live in Mumbai, that is, where a small army of 'dabbawalas' picks up 200,000 lunches from homes and delivers them to harried students, managers and workers on every working day. At your desk. 12.30 pm on the dot. Served hot, of course. And now you can even order through the Internet.
A BBC crew filming dabbawalas in action was amazed at their speed. "Following our dabbawala wasn't easy, our film crew quickly lost him in the congestion of the train station. At Victoria Terminus we found other fast moving dabbawalas, but not our subject... and at Mr Bhapat's ayurvedic pharmacy, the lunch had arrived long before the film crew," the documentary noted wryly. So, how do they work so efficiently?Amazing? :mean: No? Okie, Read and Decide it yourself /:) What is NMTBSA? Nutan Mumbai Tiffin Box Suppliers Association ABOUT NMTBSA • History : Started in 1890
• Charitable trust : Registered in 1956
• Avg. Literacy Rate : 8thGrade Schooling
• Total area coverage: 60 Kms to 70Kms
• Employee Strength : 5000
• Number of Tiffin's : 2,00,000Tiffin Boxes -i.e 4,00,000 transactions every day.
• Time taken :3hrs Working of NMTBSA
• Error Rate : 1 in 16 million transactions
• Six Sigma performance (99.999999)
• Technological Backup : Nil.
• Cost of service -Rs. 300/month ($ 6.00/month)
• Standard price for all (Weight, Distance, Space)
• Rs. 36 Cr. Turnover approx. [6000*12*5000=360000000 i.e Rs. 36 crore p.a.]
• “No strike” record as each one a share holder
• Earnings -5000 to 6000 p.m.
• Diwali bonus: one month’s from customers.
* Zero % fuel Zero % investment
*Zero % modern technology Zero % Disputes
*99.9999% performance 100 % Customer Satisfaction
DISCIPLINES : • No Alcohol Drinking during business hours
• Wearing White Cap during business hours
• Carry Identity Cards STARTING JOURNEY: 10:34-11:20 am (Andheri Stn.)
• This time period is actually the journey time. The dabbawalas load the wooden crates filled with tiffins onto the luggage or goods compartment in the train. Generally, they choose to occupy the last compartment of the train.
"12 coach train 4,000 commuters 8,000 disputes But no excuses, Duty first"
11:20 –12:30 pm (Church Gate Station)
• At this stage, the unloading takes place at the destination station
• Re-arrangement of tiffins takes place as per the destination area and destination building
• In particular areas with high density of customers (NarimanPt.,Fort , CST), a special crate is dedicated to the area. This crate carries 150 tiffins and is driven by 3-4 dabbawalas!
• In particular areas with high density of customers (NarimanPt.,Fort , CST), a special crate is dedicated to the area. This crate carries 150 tiffins and is driven by 3-4 dabbawalas! RETURN JOURNEY: 1:15 –2:00 pm ( At All Destination Stations)
• Here on begins the collection process where the dabbawalas have to pick up the tiffins from the offices where they had delivered almost an hour ago.
2:00 –2:30 pm (At Destination Station)
• The dabbawalla’s meet for the segregation as per the destination suburb.
2:48 –3:30 pm
• The return journey by train where the group finally meets up after the day’s routine of dispatching and collecting from various destination offices
• Usually, since it is more of a pleasant journey compared to the earlier part of the day, the dabbawalas lighten up the moment with merry making, joking around and singing.
3:30 –4:00 pm (The Origin Station)
• This is the stage where the final sorting and dispatch takes place. The group meets up at origin station and they finally sort out the tiffins as per the origin area. Awards and Felicitation • Shri.VarkariPrabhodhanMahasmatiDindi(palkhi) sohala–4thmarch –2001.
• Documentaries made by BBC ,UTV, MTV, ZEE TV, AAJ TAK, TV TODAY, SAHARA SAMAY, STAR TV, CNBC TV 18, CNN, SONY TV, TV TOKYO, NDTV.
• CASE STUDY –
• ICFAI Press Hyderabad
• Richard Ivey School of Business -Ontarion
• Invitation from CII for conference held in Bangalore, IIML, IIMA, CII Cochin, CII Delhi, Dr. Reddy’s Lab Foundation Hyderabad, SCMHRD Pune, SCMHRD Nasik, Sadahana –Poone.
•Included in a subject in Graduate School of Journalism University of California, Berkeley.
Radio
• German Radio Network
• Radio Mirchi
• Radio Mid-day
• FM –Gold
• BBC Radio
Invitation to Italy
• Was invited for the Terra Madre World meeting of food communities between October 20-23, 2004.
• We were part of the “Community of Cooked Food distributors from Mumbai”.
• Invited to marriage of Hon. Prince Charles of England on 9 , April 2005.
Some Achievements • World record in best time management.
• Name in “GUINESS BOOK of World Records”.
• Registered with Ripley's “believe it or not”.
After all... it is the pride of MUMBAI to have Dabbawallas culture in its part since so long... Let us wish All The Best for their Future.
222
« on: February 26, 2010, 07:14:06 PM »
Though mostly occurring in reptiles and amphibians, Polycephaly is the condition in which a body grows an extra head. The condition is very rare and in most cases - not all, though - the extra head is not completely formed and does not have a mind of its own.
223
« on: February 26, 2010, 07:53:03 AM »
The following is a test of your logic. Try to scroll so that only the questions are visible, the answers are underneath them. The questions are not that difficult.
1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?
The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe and close the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way.
2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?
Wrong Answer: Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant and close the refrigerator. Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your actions.
3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend except one. Which animal does not attend?
Correct Answer: The Elephant. The Elephant is in the refrigerator. This tests your memory. OK, even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly, you still have one more chance to show your abilities.
4. There is a river you must cross. But it is inhabited by crocodiles. How do you manage it?
Correct Answer: You swim across. All the Crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting. This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.
According to Andersen Consulting Worldwide, around 90% of the professionals they tested got all questions wrong. But many preschoolers got several correct answers.
Anderson Consulting says this conclusively disproves the theory that most professionals have the brains of a four year old.
224
« on: February 26, 2010, 07:47:52 AM »
A few minutes before church services start, everyone is sitting in their pews and talking. Suddenly, in a flash of light and a puff of smoke, Satan appears. The people scream and run out, trampling each other in a frantic effort to get away from Evil Incarnate. In seconds everyone is gone except for one elderly gentleman sitting calmly in his pew. Satan walks up to the old man and says, "Don't you know who I am?"
The man replies, "Yep, sure do."
"Aren't you afraid of me?" Satan asks.
"Nope," says the man.
"Don't you realize I can kill you with a word?" asks Satan
"Don't doubt it for a minute."
"Did you know that I could cause you profound, horrifying, physical agony for all eternity?" persists Satan.
"Yep."
"And you're still not afraid
"Nope."
More than a little perturbed, Satan asks, "Well, why aren't you afraid of me?"
"Been married to your sister for 48 years."
225
« on: February 26, 2010, 07:44:03 AM »
* You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion on demand.
* You have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.
* You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans are more of a threat than U.S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Chinese and North Korean communists.
* You have to believe that there was no art before Federal funding.
* You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical documented changes in the earth's climate and more affected by soccer moms driving SUV's.
* You have to believe that gender roles are artificial but being homosexual is natural.
* You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.
* You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th-graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.
* You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony activists who have never been outside of San Francisco do.
* You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.
* You have to believe that Mel Gibson spent $25 million of his own money to make The Passion Of The Christ for financial gain only.
* You have to believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.
* You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.
* You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, Gen. Robert E. Lee, and Thomas Edison.
* You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are not.
* You have to believe that Hillary Clinton is normal and is a very nice person.
* You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge.
* You have to believe conservatives telling the truth belong in jail, but a liar and a sex offender belonged in the White House.
* You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag, transvestites, and bestiality should be constitutionally protected, and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.
* You have to believe that illegal Democratic Party funding by the Chinese government is somehow in the best interest to the United States.
* You have to believe that this message is a part of a vast, right wing conspiracy.
226
« on: February 26, 2010, 07:28:18 AM »
A man and a woman, who have never met before, find themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a transcontinental train.
Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, the two are tired and fall asleep quickly...he in the upper bunk and she in the lower.
At 1:00 AM, he leans over the side and gently wakes the woman saying, "Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold."
"I have a better idea," she replies. "Just for tonight, let's pretend that we're married."
"Wow! That's a great idea!!" he exclaims.
"Good," she replies. "Get your own damn blanket!"
227
« on: February 26, 2010, 07:25:19 AM »
"A guy ordered a pizza to be delivered to his house. When the pizza guy arrived at his house, the resident robbed the pizza guy of all his money and the pizza at knifepoint. He let the pizza guy go, and was arrested at his house just minutes later."
"My friend's grandmother was taking a walk when a big tough guy walked by and ripped off her fake gold chain. As he run away with it she reacted ripping off his chain, which was made of real gold.
"I read a story about a guy who tried to break into a jewelry shop by throwing a concrete block through the window. Problem was the window was made of unbreakable flexi glass and the concrete block simply bounced off the window and hit the robber in the head, knocking him out cold. He was still out when the police got there and arrested him."
228
« on: February 26, 2010, 07:19:13 AM »
A man realized he needed to purchase a hearing aid, but he felt unwilling to spend much money. "How much do they run?" he asked the clerk.
"That depends," said the salesman. "They run from $2.00 to $2,000."
"Let's see the $2.00 model," he said.
The clerk put the device around the man's neck. "You just stick this button in your ear and run this little string down to your pocket," he instructed.
"How does it work?" the customer asked.
"For $2.00 it doesn't work," the salesman replied. "But when people see it on you, they'll talk louder!"
229
« on: February 26, 2010, 07:13:48 AM »
Let's see if I understand how America works lately .
If a woman burns her thighs on the hot coffee she was holding in her lap while driving, she blames the restaurant.
If your teen-age son kills himself, you blame the rock 'n' roll music or musician he liked.
If you smoke three packs a day for 40 years and die of lung cancer, your family blames the tobacco company.
If your daughter gets pregnant by the football captain you blame the school for poor sex education.
If your neighbor crashes into a tree while driving home drunk, you blame the bartender.
If your cousin gets AIDS because the needle he used to shoot up heroin with was dirty, you blame the government for not providing clean ones.
If your grandchildren are brats without manners, you blame television.
If your friend is shot by a deranged madman, you blame the gun manufacturer.
And finally, if a crazed person breaks into the cockpit and tries to kill the pilots at 35,000 feet, and the passengers kill him instead, the mother of the deceased blames the airline.
I must have lived too long to understand the world as it is anymore.
So if I die while my old, wrinkled ass is parked in front of this computer, I want you to blame Bill Gates, OK?
230
« on: February 26, 2010, 07:07:28 AM »
[this has been around for a while, and was also quoted/paraphrased on the U.S. TV show "The West Wing"] Dr. Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality who dispenses advice to people who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that, as an observant Orthodox ; Jew, - 'Homosexuality is an abomination! According to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned in any circumstance'. The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned by a US resident, which was posted on the Internet. Dear Dr. Laura:
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate.
I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them.
1. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - ( Lev. 1:9 ) . The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus (21:7 ) . In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - (Lev. 15:19-24 ) . The problem is, how do I tell? I ; have tried asking, but most women take offense.
4. Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that ; this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?
6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination - (Lev. 11:10 ), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?
7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?
8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?
9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? (Lev. 24:10-16). Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)
I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging. Your devoted disciple and adoring fan.
Jim
231
« on: February 26, 2010, 06:59:43 AM »
An elderly couple had dinner at another couple's house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen.
The two elderly gentlemen were talking, and one said, "Last night we went out to a new restaurant, and it was really great. I would recommend it very highly."
The other man said, "What is the name of the restaurant?"
The first man thought and thought and finally said, "What is the name of that flower you give to someone you love? You know... the one that is red and has thorns."
"Do you mean a rose?"
"Yes," the man said. He turned toward the kitchen and yelled, "Rose, what's the name of that restaurant we went to last night?
232
« on: February 26, 2010, 06:54:50 AM »
A Fairy told a married couple, "For being such an exemplary married couple for 35 years, I will give you each a wish".
"I want to travel around the world with my dearest husband" said the wife. And the fairy moved her magic stick and abracadabra! Two tickets appeared in her hands.
Now it was the husbands turn. He thought for a moment and said, "Well this moment is very romantic, but an opportunity like this only occurs once in a lifetime. So... I'm sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me".
The wife was deeply disappointed but, a wish was a wish. The Fairy made a circle with her magic stick and...abracadabra!..suddenly the husband was 90 years old.
Lesson: Men might be rotten and selfish and inconsiderate ... But, Fairies are.................Females
233
« on: February 26, 2010, 06:46:07 AM »
My face in the mirror
Isn't wrinkled or drawn.
My house isn't dirty.
The cobwebs are gone.
My garden looks lovely
And so does my lawn.
I think I might never
Put my glasses back on.
234
« on: February 26, 2010, 06:44:25 AM »
A young man wanted to get his beautiful wife something nice for their first wedding anniversary, so he decided to buy her a cell phone. She was all excited. She loved her phone. He explained to her all the features on the phone.
The next day she went shopping. Her phone rang, and it was her husband calling.
"Hi, hon," he said. "How do you like your new phone?"
She replied "I just love it. It's so small, and your voice is clear as a bell. But there's one thing I don't understand."
"What's that, baby?" asks the husband.
"How did you know I was at Wal-Mart?"
235
« on: February 26, 2010, 06:38:01 AM »
Three guys die in an accident and go to heaven.
When they get there, St. Peter says, "We only have one rule in heaven. Don't step on the ducks!"
So they enter heaven and sure enough, there are ducks all over the place.
It is almost impossible not to step on a duck and although they try their best to avoid them, the first guy accidentally steps on one. Along comes St. Peter with the ugliest woman he ever saw. St. Peter chains them together and says, "Your punishment for stepping on a duck is to spend eternity chained to this ugly woman.
The next day, the second guy steps accidentally on a duck and along comes St. Peter, who doesn't miss a thing, and with him is another extremely ugly woman. He chains them together with the same admonishment as the first guy.
The third guy has observed all this and not wanting to be chained for all eternity to an ugly woman, is very careful where he steps. He manages to go months without stepping on any duck. One day St. Peter comes up to him with the most gorgeous woman he had ever laid eyes on. A very tall, tanned, curvaceous, sexy brunette.
St. Peter chains them together without saying a word. The guy remarks, "Wonder what I did to deserve being chained to you for all eternity?"
She says, "I don't know about you, but I stepped on a duck."
236
« on: February 25, 2010, 09:48:25 PM »
Two local men were injured when their pickup truck left the road and struck a tree near Cotton Patch on State Highway 38 early Monday.
Woodruff County deputy Dovey Snyder reported the accident shortly after midnight Monday. Thurston Poole, 33, of Des Arc, and Billy Ray Wallis, 38, of Little Rock, were returning to Des Arc after a frog catching trip.
On an overcast Sunday night, Poole's pickup truck headlights malfunctioned. The two men concluded that the headlight fuse on the older-model truck had burned out. As a replacement fuse was not available, Wallis noticed that the .22 caliber bullets from his pistol fit perfectly into the fuse box next to the steering-wheel column.
Upon inserting the bullet the headlights again began to operate properly, and the two men proceeded on eastbound toward the White River Bridge. After traveling approximately 20 miles, and just before crossing the river, the bullet apparently overheated, discharged, and struck Poole in the balls. :laugh:
237
« on: February 25, 2010, 09:16:46 PM »
Q. How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?
A. Concrete floors are very hard to crack!
**********
Q. If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long would it take four men to build it?
A. No time at all it is already built.
**********
Q. Approximately how many birthdays does the average Japanese woman have?
A. Just one. All the others are anniversaries.
**********
Q. If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have?
A. Very large hands.
***********
Q. How can you lift an elephant with one hand?
A. It is not a problem, since you will never find an elephant with one hand.
**********
Q. How can a man go eight days without sleep?
A. He sleeps at night.
**********
Q. Why it is impossible to send a telegram to Washington today?
A: Because he is dead.
**********
Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become?
A: It becomes wet.
**********
Q. What often falls but never gets hurt?
A : Rain
***********
Q. What is that no man ever saw which never was but always will be?
A : TOMORROW
**********
Q. What looks like half apple?
A : The other half.
**********
Q. What can you never eat for breakfast?
A : Dinner.
**********
Q. What gets wet with drying?
A : A towel
**********
Q. What 3 letters change a girl into a woman?
A : AGE.
**********
Q. What happened when wheel was invented?
A : It caused a revolution.
**********
Q. Why is it easy to weigh a fish?
A : Because it has its own scales.
**********
Q. Why does a bike rest on its leg?
A : Because it is too tyred.
**********
Q. Bay of Bengal is in which state
A : liquid
238
« on: February 25, 2010, 08:59:08 PM »
GEORGE W. BUSH
The White House
1600 Pennsylvania Avenue
Washington, DC 20520
EDUCATION AND EXPERIENCE
Law Enforcement:
I was arrested in Kennebunkport, Maine, in 1976 for driving under the influence of alcohol. I pled guilty, paid a fine, and had my driver's license suspended for 30 days. My Texas driving record has been "lost" and is not available.
Military:
I joined the Texas Air National Guard and went AWOL. I refused to take a drug test or answer any questions about my drug use. By joining the Texas Air National Guard, I was able to avoid combat duty in Vietnam.
College:
I graduated from Yale University with a low C average. I was a cheerleader.
PAST WORK EXPERIENCE
I ran for U.S. Congress and lost. I began my career in the oil business in Midland, Texas, in 1975. I bought an oil company, but couldn't find any oil in Texas. The company went bankrupt shortly after I sold all my stock. I bought the Texas Rangers baseball team in a sweetheart deal that took land using taxpayer money. I sold Sammy Sosa. With the help of my father and our friends in the oil industry (including Enron CEO Ken Lay), I was elected governor of Texas.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS GOVERNOR OF TEXAS
- I changed Texas pollution laws to favor power and oil companies, making Texas the most polluted state in the Union. During my tenure, Houston replaced Los Angeles as the most smog-ridden city in America.
- I cut taxes and bankrupted the Texas treasury to the tune of billions in borrowed money.
- I set the record for the most executions by any governor in American history.
- With the help of my brother, the governor of Florida, and my father's appointments to the Supreme Court, I became President after losing by over 500,000 votes.
ACCOMPLISHMENTS AS PRESIDENT
- I am the first President in U.S. history to enter office with a criminal record
- I invaded and occupied two countries at a continuing cost of over one billion dollars per week.
- I spent the U.S. surplus and effectively bankrupted the U.S. Treasury.
- I shattered the record for the largest annual deficit in U.S. history.
- I set an economic record for most private bankruptcies filed in any 12-month period.
- I set the all-time record for most foreclosures in a 12-month period.
- I set the all-time record for the biggest drop in the history of the U.S. stock market. In my first year in office, over 2 million Americans lost their jobs and that trend continues every month.
- I'm proud that the members of my cabinet are the richest of any administration in U.S. history. My "poorest millionaire," Condoleeza Rice, has a Chevron oil tanker named after! her.
- I set the record for most campaign fund-raising trips by a U.S. President.
- I am the all-time U.S. and world record-holder for receiving the most corporate campaign donations.
- My largest lifetime campaign contributor, and one of my best friends, Kenneth Lay, presided over the largest corporate bankruptcy fraud in U.S. History-Enron.
- My political party used Enron private jets and corporate attorneys to ensure my success with the U.S. Supreme Court during my election decision.
- I have protected my friends at Enron and Halliburton against investigation or prosecution. More time and money was spent investigating
the Monica Lewinsky affair than has been spent investigating one of the biggest corporate rip-offs in history.
- I presided over the biggest energy crisis in U.S. history and refused to intervene when corruption involving the oil industry was revealed.
- I presided over the !! highest gasoline prices in U.S. history.
- I changed ! the U.S. policy to allow convicted criminals to be awarded government contracts.
- I appointed more convicted criminals to administration than any President in U.S. history.
- I created the Ministry of Homeland Security, the largest bureaucracy in the history of the United States government.
- I've broken more international treaties than any President in U.S. history.
- I am the first President in U.S. history to have the United Nations remove the U.S. from the Human Rights Commission.
- I withdrew the U.S. from the World Court of Law.
- I refused to allow inspector's access to U.S "prisoners of war" detainees, and have refused to abide by the Geneva Convention.
- I am the first President in history to refuse United Nations election inspectors (during the 2002 U.S. elections).
- I set the record for fewest numbers of press conference! s of any President since the advent of television.
- I set the all-time record for most days on vacation in any one-year period. After taking off the entire month of August 2001, I presided over
the worst security failure in U.S. history.
- I garnered the most sympathy ever for the U.S. after the World Trade Center attacks and less than a year later made the U.S. the most hated country in the world---the largest failure of diplomacy in world history.
- I have set the all-time record for most people worldwide to simultaneously protest me in public venues (15 million people), shattering
the record for protests against any person in the history of mankind.
- I am the first President in U.S. history to order an unprovoked, preemptive attack and the military occupation of a sovereign nation. I did
so against the will of the United Nations, the majority of U.S. citizens, and the world community.
- I have cut ! health care benefits for war veterans and support a cut in! duty benefits for active duty troops and their families in war! time.
- In my State of the Union Address, I lied about our reasons for attacking Iraq and then blamed the lies on our British friends.
- I am the first President in history to have a majority of Europeans (71%) view my presidency as the biggest threat to world peace and security.
- I am supporting development of a nuclear "Tactical Bunker Buster," a WMD.
- I have so far failed to fulfill my pledge to bring Osama Bin Laden to justice.
RECORDS AND REFERENCES
- All records of my tenure as governor of Texas are now in my father's library, sealed and unavailable for public view.
- All records of SEC investigations into my insider trading and my bankrupt companies are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public view.
- All records or minutes from meetings that I, or my Vice-President, attended regarding public energy policy are sealed in secrecy and unavailable for public review.
239
« on: February 25, 2010, 08:52:31 PM »
John is mowing his lawn when he sees a new neighbor moving in. He stops and steps to the fence to see what the new neighbor is like. After calling him over, the new neighbor, Bob, tells says that he is a Professor of Deductive Reasoning at the college.
John- Deductive Reasoning? What's that?
Bob- Well, lemme give you an example. I see you have a doghouse. That leads me to believe you have a dog. If you have a dog, perhaps you have children. If you have children, then I would deduce that you have a wife. By having a wife, you are enforcing that you are a heterosexual.
John- That's pretty neat!
They part ways and John goes to talk to another neighbor, Jerry, who is watching the move.
Jerry- New neighbor, huh? What's he do?
John- He's a Professor of Deductive Reasoning at the college.
Jerry- Deductive Reasoning? What's that?
John- Lemme give you an example. Do you have a dog?
Jerry- No, I don't.
John- Fag!
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« on: February 25, 2010, 08:45:43 PM »
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