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Topics - @@JeEt@@
2661
« on: September 25, 2010, 04:13:05 AM »
Once a plane crashed somewhere in the mountains, only a monkey who was traveling in the plane was left alive.
Fortunately the monkey was intelligent enough to understand English and reply. The officials went to see the monkey in the hospital and had a talk with the monkey.
Officer: “When the plane took off what were the travelers doing?”
Monkey: “Tying their belts”
Officer: “What were the air hostesses doing?”
Monkey: “Saying Hello! Good morning!”
Officer: “What were the pilots doing?”
Monkey: “Checking the system”
Officer: “What were you doing?”
Monkey: “Looking for my people”
Officer: “After 10 minutes what were the travelers doing?”
Monkey: “Having beverages and snacks”
Officer: “What were the air hostesses doing?”
Monkey: “Serving the travelers”
Officer: “What were the Pilots doing?”
Monkey: “Handling the steering”
Officer: “What were you doing?”
Monkey: “Eating & throwing”
Officer: “After 30 minutes what were the travelers doing?”
Monkey: “Some were sleeping and some were reading”
Officer: “What were the air hostesses ?”
Monkey: “Make up”
Officer: “What were the pilots doing?”
Monkey: “Handling the steering”
Officer: “What were you doing?”
Monkey: “Nothing”
Officer: “Just before plane crash what were the travelers doing?”
Monkey: “All were sleeping”
Officer: “What were the air hostesses doing?”
Monkey: “Kissing the pilots”
Officer: “What were the pilots doing?”
Monkey: “Responding”
Officer: “What were you doing?”
Monkey: “Handling the steering !!!”
2662
« on: September 25, 2010, 03:39:04 AM »
yuvi ne theke de malik nu raat nu ek waje fone kitabhaji theka kine wje khulga.......
malikswere 9 wje...
eh ghante baad fir yuvi ne fone kita:bhaji theka kine wje khulga......
malikswere 9 wje...
yuvi ne 3-4 war enj e kita...jad yuvi ne 5vi war fone kita ta malik khij k :angry: :angry: :angry:kehnda tainu chahida ki aa..
yuvikuj ni bhaji main theke de andar beitha ji :excited: :excited:.............
malik:
2663
« on: September 23, 2010, 04:56:58 AM »
Ohdi nafarat di hi sahi, par kise cheej di haqdaar ta ban gayi,
Ohda aaun wala kal na sahi, par beeti hoyi yaad ta ban gayi,
Main oh kissa na sahi jo oh sab nu suna sake,
Par jis utte sab nu hassa sake, oh majaak ta ban gayi,
Parh parh k laayi hoyi kitaaban di dheri wicho,
Kise konne ch ruldi koi kitaab tan ban gayi,
Main oh phull na sahi jehnu oh apne dil de baag ch khila sake,
par uhde pairan heth masleya ik Gulaab ta ban gayi,
Main us aasmaan ch chamakda koi taara na sahi jihnu tak k oh khoobsurti da maan karda,
Par 'ravv' us chann de mathe da ik daag ta ban gayi.....
2664
« on: September 23, 2010, 04:53:17 AM »
3 guys named
What
Why
When
Were talking
What:why what r u doing ?
Why:i dont know what i am doing
What:why ?
Why:why r u calling me ? What?
What:now why did u call me ?
Why:what ! When did i call u ?
When:what is ur problem why r u calling me ?
Why: what?did i call u ? When?
What n when: what?
When:why r u calling urself?
Why : did i call myself when?
When:what?
What:why did u call me ?dont ask when ?
Why n when: what :angry: :angry: ??
2665
« on: September 23, 2010, 04:51:19 AM »
A punjabi woman is walking along a street at christmas time and she sees an english man walking towards her
she slips and screams "haiii meri kistmat!" and the english man replies "hi merry christmas to you aswell"
2666
« on: September 23, 2010, 04:48:04 AM »
A Little Girl was praying on her birthday :rabb: :rabb: :rabb:..:
" :rabb:Oh Lord..
On my 6th Birthday :balle: :balle:..
Plz send those clothes for all those POOR WOMEN..
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who are in my Brother's Laptop :blush:..!! "
:rockon: :rockon: :rockon:
2667
« on: September 23, 2010, 04:42:35 AM »
Doctor : You have Brain Cancer...
Patient jumps with joy, Yeaaah....YaaaHoooO...
Doctor : What happened ?
Patient : For the first I heard that I have Brain...
2668
« on: September 23, 2010, 04:37:36 AM »
teacher :- :angry: :angry: :angry:When is your birthday?
guglo mugloo :-26th June.
teacher :-What year?
gugloo :-Every year :rockon: :rockon: :rockon:
2669
« on: September 23, 2010, 04:27:16 AM »
Mallika arrived at a Railway Station for a shooting.
Bhikhari: Behanji 1 rupiya dedo.
Malika gave him 1000 Rs.
Secretary: Why u gave him 1000 Rs..?
Malika: Pehli bar kisine behan kaha!
* * * * *
Ek larka apni girlfriend se milne gaya, kuch baat ke baad uski girlfirend chaye(tea) banane ke liye kitchen chali gayi.
Girlfriend ka mobile sofay pe dekh kar larky ne socha ke chalo dekhte hai mera number iss ne kis naam se save kya hai?
Dear, sweetu ya jaanu.
Jab usne misscall di toh screen pe likh raha tha “Murgha No.5? Calling”.
* ****
Pappu ek party mein gaya aur waha usne 8 butter naan kha liye
Kuch der baad toilet mein sar pakad ke ro raha tha bhagwan se request kar raha tha ki, “Hey bhagwan ya toh jaan nikal de ya naan nikal de!”
*********
ik muslman bhara Ahmad Ali de 4 bache see , rahat Ali, ajij ali . azeem Ali .naseem Ali, kuch salan bad 2 bache hor hoe ,fer ahmed ali di begam ne
ohna de nam rakhe , rehmkar ali , baskar Ali ..
2670
« on: September 13, 2010, 09:50:32 AM »
KARO MOHABBAT KISI SE IS KADAR,
KI PHIR ISHQ KI GUNJAISH NA RAHE…,
MILE AGAR ZINDGI DUBARA TUMHE,
TO PHIR JINE KI KHAWAISH NA RAHE…!
2671
« on: September 13, 2010, 09:47:32 AM »
simrii nu 20 Million di lottery nikkal aayi te oh Rs. Len layi chali gayi .. Lets enjoy conversation between lottery director and simrii.
simrii = Leao mainu meri winning amount dawo sidhe hoke.
L. Director = Eh lao 1 million te Baki Rs tohanu har saal kishat wich dwange te every year 1 million kishat.
simrii = Dekho.. Eh ta galat gal a.. J tusi aine rs. Nahi de sakde c taa aina wadda panga len di ki lod c.. tusi bewkuf bnayi jaa rahe ho
L.director = Dekho bibi ji tohanu 1 million ditta a tusi pher v raula paayi jane o te baaki v dwange asi bhajan taa ni lagge.
simrii (gusse nal ) = :angry: :angry:AH CHAK APNA 1 MILLION TE MAINU MERE 20 Rs. WAPIS KARDE JINNA DI MEI LOTTERY PAYI C.
2672
« on: September 13, 2010, 09:44:45 AM »
jhanda amli praying to god :rabb: :rabb:
jhanda-- rabba mainu 1000 rs. di bahut lor aa :rabb: :rabb:,,tu meri kar deve tan,,uss vicho 500 rs. gurudware matha tek devanga,,,
achanak amli nu raste ch 500 da note mil giya,,,
jhanda-- le rabba ,,,tera v aoukha ee aaaa,,,,,, :angry:tenu mere te bhrosa ni c ,,jo pehlan hi 500 rs. kat ke dita eee
rab ji-- :sad: :sad: :sad:
2673
« on: September 10, 2010, 01:07:43 PM »
Ohna Nu Changa Lagda Bhul Jana,
Asi Yaad Ch Pagal Ho Jande.
Sanu Yaad Ch Neend Na Aaundi Ae,
Oh Bhul Ke Sanu So Jande.
Ajj Pata Laga Mainu Dunia Da,
Kinj Lok Saade Ton Kho Jande.
Kinj Lok Praye Hunde Ne,
Kinj Dil De Tukde Ho Jande.
Oh Sade Naal Karde Time Paas,
Asi Ohna Lai Pagal Ho Jande.
sandhu Nu Duniya Te Na Aitbar Koi,
Ethe Ta Parchave Vi Praye Ho Jande
2674
« on: September 10, 2010, 01:00:16 PM »
Osama Bin Laden himself decided to send George Bush a letter in his own handwriting to let him know he was still in the game. Bush opened the letter and it appeared to contain a single line of coded message: 370HSSV-0773H
Bush was baffled, so he e-mailed it to Condi Rice. Condi and her aides had no clue either, so they sent it to the FBI.
No one could solve it at the FBI so it went to the CIA, then to the NSA.
With no clue as to its meaning they eventually asked Britain's MI-6 for help. Within a minute MI-6 cabled the White House with this reply: "Tell the President he's holding the message upside down."
2675
« on: September 10, 2010, 12:57:25 PM »
A Guy in Aeroplane sttod up N Shouted
" HIJACK !!!! "
All Passengers got scared N raised Hands.
4rm Other End Of The Plane A Guy Shouted Back
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".Hi JOHN".
2676
« on: September 10, 2010, 03:35:35 AM »
Operator: "Thank you for calling Pizza Hut."
Customer: "Haloo, can I order ."
Operator: "Can I have your multi purpose Smart Card number, Sir?"
Customer: "It's eh..., hold on .... 6102049998-45- 54610"
Operator: "OK ... you're .. Mr Perera and you're calling from
Dhehiwela. Perera. Your home number is 4123456, your office 76543210
and your mobile is 077 1234567. "
Customer: "How did you get all my phone numbers?"
Operator: "We are connected to the Main CRM system Sir"
Customer: "I want Seafood Pizza .."
Operator: "That's not a good idea Sir"
Customer: "Why?????!"
Operator: "According to your medical records, you have high blood
pressure and an even higher cholesterol level Sir"
Customer: "What? ... What do you recommend then?"
Operator: "Try our Low Fat Hokkien Mee Pizza. You'll like it"
Customer: "How do you know I will like it?"
Operator: "You borrowed a book entitled "Popular Hokkien Dishes" from
the National Library last week Sir"
Customer: "OK, I give up .. Give me three family sized ones then. How
much will that cost?
Operator: "That should be enough for your family of 10, Sir. The
total is Rs.985/-"
Customer: "Can I pay by credit card?"
Operator: "I'm afraid you have to pay us cash, Sir. Your credit card
is over the limit and you're owing your bank Rs.13,929.55 since
October last year" "That's not including the late payment charges on
your housing loan Sir.
Customer: "I guess I have to run to the neighborhood ATM and withdraw
some cash before your guy arrives"
Operator: "You can't Sir. Based on the records, you've reached your
daily limit on machine withdrawal today"
Customer: "Never mind just send the pizzas, I'll have the cash ready.
How long is it gonna take anyway?"
Operator: "About 45 minutes Sir, but if you can't wait you can always
come and collect it by your motorcycle.. "
Customer: " What???????? !"
Operator: "According to the details in system, you own a Scooter,...
registration number BE1123 "
Customer: "*'!^ *#?@%^**%^I7*"
Operator: "Better watch your language Sir. Remember on 15th July 1987
you were convicted of using abusive language at a policeman
Customer: [Speechless]
Operator: "Is there anything else Sir?"
Customer: "Nothing ... by the way .. aren't you giving me that 3 Free
bottles of cola as advertised?"
Operator: "We normally would Sir, but based on your records you're
also a diabetic ..... "
Customer :?......?... ..?...*.. *.....??. .* . **.......... ?**.
*???.
Keep smiling....
2677
« on: September 10, 2010, 03:32:19 AM »
A teacher asked a simrii to write 55.
Simrii asked: How?
Teacher: Write 5 and beside it another 5!
simrii wrote 5 and stopped.
teacher: What are you waiting for?
simrii: I don't know which side to write the other 5 :wait: :wait:
2678
« on: September 10, 2010, 03:29:38 AM »
"FRIENDS STAND BEHIND U DURING UR BAD TIMES"
Do u want a documentary proof ??
Ok,In future check out ur marriage album..U'll find al frns behind u !!!
2679
« on: September 10, 2010, 03:07:29 AM »
na maro menu kukh vich ,
na maro,
mainu v eh sohna jag dekh lain deo,
mainu v kise nu veer,
kise nu maa keh lain deo,
na maro menu kukh vich ,
na maro,
main hi maa da umra tak sath nibhauna,
main hi veere de gut te rakhri nu sajauna,
peo da sara dukh dard vandauna,
na maro menu kukh vich ,
na maro,
mere bina sare rishtey veh jaan ge,
vere mame chache reh jan-ge
te bhua-massiyan sirf shabad ban k reh jan-ge,
na maro menu kukh vich ,
na maro,
pta ni dosh ki hai mera,
pta ni kehdi dushmani,
jehde maape kehnde kudi ni jamani
na maro menu kukh vich ,
na maro,
shayad meri awaaz tuhade kani pae jawegi
meri jaan bach jawegi,
meri zindagi bach jawegi,
2680
« on: September 10, 2010, 02:54:32 AM »
jhanda amli Bullet te ja reha c....ik kudi Activa te..
jhanda to Girl...," Bullet Chalana anda."
Kudi guse vich age lang gyi...
jhanda Barabar ake," Hanji...Bullet chalana anda."
kudi fer uthe hi khad gi..jhanda age lang gya..te Age jake jhanda Da accident ho gya..
Kudi ake," Lai Lya Maza....aa gya swad Bullet da"
jhanda," Chal Bandriye... :angry: :angry:.tahi puchda c bullet chalana anda ta das Break Kithe a."
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