we have 2 basic differences in love – selfish love and selfless love. The mundane or worldly love is selfish. The Gurbani boldly declares that in this material world “all are concerned only with their own happiness” (ਜਗਤ ਮੈ ਝੂਠੀ ਦੇਖੀ ਪ੍ਰੀਤਿ ॥ ਅਪਨੇ ਹੀ ਸੁਖ ਸਿਉ ਸਭ ਲਾਗੇ ਕਿਆ ਦਾਰਾ ਕਿਆ ਮੀਤ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥ Jagat mai jhoothee dekhee preeti. Apane hee sukh siou sabh laage kiaa daaraa kiaa meet. ||1|| rehaao ||, sggs 536).

Selfless love is “rare”. Because, as the Gurbani says, those who (by becoming the Gurmukhs ) understand (ਸੂਝ-ਬੂਝ, Giaan …) this Truth are also very “rare” in this world.

To put it otherwise, selfish love is the love of Maya (duality …). And the selfless love is the love of the One, for the sake of the One (ਹੋਰੁ ਸਭ ਪ੍ਰੀਤਿ ਮਾਇਆ ਮੋਹੁ ਕਾਚਾ ॥: Horu sabh pareeti Maya mohu kaachaa, sggs 164).

Thus, the very definition of the True Love is that it can never be selfish. It is Divine. If love is motivated by selfishness, then it cannot be a True Love.

Selfish love is a mundane business. There is give and take in it – though very little “give” (if any), but more “take”. Such crooked and sneaky love is always in flux – goes up and down depending on whether things are going “good” or “badly” in life. As indicated in the Gurbani, this sort of love is a mundane trade.

On the other hand, in selfless love, there is no “take” – there is only “give”. Such True Love does not fluctuate. According to the Gurbani, those who are immersed in such Pure Love are the True Lovers.