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Topics - The Goru
81
« on: September 13, 2009, 12:07:11 PM »
wah jhanda amli kmaal kr reha hai.... aap chaahe dub jaaye pr ehnu ni dubann dena .... bahut mast job kr reha hai............kmaal kr ditti tu.......... :hehe: :hehe: :hehe:
82
« on: September 13, 2009, 09:23:29 AM »
Dangerous Sahmpoo.....aware this all products plz.....! Sodium Laureth Sulfate
SLS CLEAR , FRUCTIS , Vo5, Palmolive, Paul Mitchell, L'Oreal, Body Shop
All these Shampoos use a chemical called SLS which is actually a floor cleaner. They are used so as to produce more foam.
Imagine what a floor cleaner can do to you hair and scalp. It will damage the very roots of your scalp. Check out for SLS in toothpaste too!!! Use the ones which are free from this extremely harmful chemical.
83
« on: September 12, 2009, 10:21:28 PM »
PROFILE
NAME : ROWAN SEBASTIAN ATKINSON a.ka Mr.Bean / Row.
BIRTH DATE / PLACE: JANUARY,09 1955 In Newcastle-upon- Tyne , UK .
WIFE : SUNETRA SASTRY
SON : BENJAMIN ATKINSON
DAUGHTER: LILY ATKINSON
84
« on: September 12, 2009, 01:17:34 PM »
Q: What Are The Two Reasons Why Women Don't Mind Thier Own Business...???
85
« on: September 12, 2009, 12:40:10 PM »
A for apple. B for bada apple. C for chhota apple. D for dusra apple. E for ek aur apple. F for fokat ka apple. G for gol apple. H for hazar apple I for itney saarey apple? J for jaao nahi khaana hai apple K for kaise nahi khaayengey apple L for lena padhega tumko apple M for mujhe nahi chahiye itne apple N for naa nahi kehtey kyunkey yeh hai apple O for Oh to tumne khaa daale yeh saare apple P for peth bhar Ke khaao apple Q for qismat mein nahi hoti hai sabke, yeh apple R for roz agar khaao tum apple S for sehetmand rahoge khaaogey agar tum apple T for tumko nahi milengey itney achey apple U for udhaar kii nahi hai yeh apple V for very tasty hai yeh apple W for waste na karo time aur khaalo jaldi se apple X for X'mas mei bhii khane padenge apple Y for youn na chehra phero dekhkey apple Z for zaroor dil bhar gaya hoga khake itne saare apple
86
« on: September 12, 2009, 12:31:50 PM »
Zara si pj mein de jagah tu Zara sa add kar dost bana Zara sa comment mein saja tu Zara sa buddies mein basa
Mein karo comment tujhko Meri jaan bepanah Fida hoon tujhpe Meray comment bepanah
Wooooo hhhhooo ooohhhh hooo…
Mein tere mein tere comment mein rakh du yeh apna jahan Mera comment ki deewangi
Ohhhhoo..
Hai nahi hai nahi Aashiq koi mujhsa tera Tu mere liye meri dosti
Keh bhi de keh bhi de Dil mein tere jo hai chupa Kwahish jo hai teri
Rakh nahi rakh nahi Parda koi mujhse aye jaan Kar le tu mera yakeen
Mein chahun comment tujhko Meri jaan bepanah Fida karu comment tujhpe Meri jaan bepanah
j wadia lgyaa taa ds deyo...
agar ni lgyaa taa v ds deyo :hehe: :hehe: :hehe: :hehe:
87
« on: September 12, 2009, 12:26:45 PM »
Ramm ka letter sita ke liye punjabi me......
Pyari Sitta, Main itthe raji khushi se han and hope ke tu v theek thaak hovengi, Laxman tannu bahut yaad karda si. Main is Bandar de hath tannu chitthi bhej reha haan, Tu bilkul tension na layi main bahut jaldi tenu ravan kolo chura lavanga. Main AIRTEL da postpaid le liya hai, RAVAN nu main mobile te bhot GAALIYAAN kadiya te SAALE ne phone katt ditta, Chal koi ni maine aana ta hai hi. Taan KUTUNGA saale KANJAR nu. Main tere vaste bhi ek AIRTEL da prepaid bhej reya aa ode ch 1500 SMS free wali scheme ha, Tu roz mennu SMS kari. Chinta na kari, jab bhi gal karan nu ji kare, ek miss call mar diyo. Main ithho tere naal gal kar levanga. raat 11 se subhe 8 bajen de tak mainu 10 paisa call lavanga scheme tai chalande. Tu Mere bill di chinta na kariyo, Sugreev nu payment da jimma de ditta hai.
88
« on: September 12, 2009, 12:08:44 PM »
Funny full forms of Big Companies
1. NIIT : Not Interested in IT
2. WIPRO : Weak Input, Poor & Rubbish Output
3. HCL : Hidden Costs & Losses
4. TCS : Totally Confusing Solutions
5. INFOSYS :Inferior Offline Systems
6. HUGHES : Highly Useless Graduates Hired for Eating and Sleeping
7. BAAN : Beggars Association and Nerds
8. IBM : Implicitly Boring Machines
9. SATYAM : Sad And Tired Yelling Away Madly
10.. PARAM : Puzzled And Ridiculous Array of Microprocessors
11.. C-DOT : Coffee During Office Timings
12.. AT&T : All Troubles & Terrible
13.. CMC : Coffee, Meals and Comfort
14.. DEC : Drifting & Exhausted Computers
15.. BFL : Brainwash First and Let them go
17.. TISL : Totally Inconsistent Systems Ltd.
18.. PSI : Peculiar Symptoms of India
19.. ORACLE : On-line Romance And Chatting with Lady Employees.
20.. MASTEK: Mad And Stupid Technitians Enroute to Kabaarkhana
21..PATNI : Pathetic Appraisal Techniques, No Increments
89
« on: September 12, 2009, 11:11:53 AM »
ना back की परवाह , ना subjects सारे clear हैं यारों हम engineer हैं
ना job की tension ,ना future का कोई fear हैं यारों हम engineer हैं
हाथ में किताबों की जगह , table पर beer हैं यारों हम engineer हैं
c++,java नहीं chating अपना career हैं यारों हम engineer हैं
late nite studies नहीं ,late night premier हैं यारों हम engineer हैं
यहाँ कोई einstein नहीं,यहाँ पर सब shakespeer हैं यारों हम engineer हैं
हम रहे भले चंगे ,चाहे देश की हालत severe हैं यारों हम engineer हैं
माँ ने सोचा था ,मेरा बेटा engineer बनेगा ले माँ तेरा बेटा आज engineer हैं
proud to b an engineer
90
« on: September 10, 2009, 11:19:12 AM »
Universal law:
" Love can neither be created nor be destroyed; only it can transfer from One girlfriend to another girlfriend with some loss of money "
first law:
" a boy in love with a girl, continue to be in love with her and a girl in love with a boy, continue to be in love with him, until or unless any external agent(brother or father of the gal) comes into play and break the legs of the boy. "
second law:
" the rate of change of intensity of love of a girl towards a boy is directly proportional to the instantaneous bank balance of the boy and the direction of this love is same to as increment or decrement of the bank balance. "
third law:
" the force applied while proposing a girl by a boy is equal and opposite to the force applied by the girl while slapping him.............
91
« on: September 10, 2009, 11:14:19 AM »
Jo....
Ho.... Gaya.....
Wo.... Ho.... Gaya.....
Jo.....
Hona.... Hoga....
Wo.... Hoga....
Aur .....Jo
Nahi... Hona... Hai
Wo.... Nahi.... Hoga....
Kyun....kay... Jo...
Hona.... Hai...
Wo... To...
Hoga... Hi.... Hoga....
Ab... Dekhna.... Hai....
Kay.... Kya....
Hoga.....?...
Aur....
Kya....Nahi....
Hoga....
Hone.... Ko.... To...
Kuch..... Bhi.....
Hoga....
Yahi.... Sochna.... Hai....
Kay... Kiya...
Hoga......?
Aur..... Kya... Hoga....
Agar...
Kuch..... Hoga.... To.....
Theek... Hoga....
Aur....
Nahi.... Hoga....
To.... Bhi...
Theek.... Hoga....
Theek... Hoga... To....
Kis... taarhan.. Say....
Hoga....
Aur....
agar...
Theek....Nahi... Hoga...
To.... Kuch..
Kaisay... Theek.... Hoga.....?...
Ab.... Aap.... Batao.... Kay...
Aage...
Kiya... Hoga?..
kisi..
aur..
ko..
tum,..bhi..bhejo,..
acchha....time pass ya time waste hoga..........
92
« on: September 10, 2009, 11:11:25 AM »
एक जंतु का नाम है "GirlFriend" . . . . . .
ये अक्सर "Boyfriend" के साथ पाई जाती है !
इनका पोस्टिक आहार "Boyfriend" का भेजा होता है !
इनको अक्सर नाराज होने का नाटक करते हुए देखा जा सकता है ! पर अगर पैसे खर्च किये जाये तो फिर नाटक ख़त्म हो जाता है...
इस प्राणी का सबसे खतरनाक हथियार रोना और इमोशनली ब्लैक मेल करना होता है !
गर्ल फ्रेंड से ब्रेक अप पर टेंशन नाम की बीमारी हो जाती है, जिसका कोई इलाज नहीं.. ये ही एक ऐसा प्राणी है जिसपे कोई विस्वास नहीं करता है...
गर्ल फ्रेंड के लिए बॉय फ्रेंड कुछ भी कर सकता है, यहाँ तक की हस्ते हस्ते कुत्ता भी बनता है... इस प्राणी में बहुत सारे अवगुण फिर भी ये प्राणी इतनी आसानी से नहीं मिलता है, ये प्राणी भाव बहुत खाता है, पर इस प्राणी के पास होता कुछ भी नहीं है जो वास्तविक हो जिसपे भाव खाया जा सके
93
« on: September 09, 2009, 07:22:13 AM »
group photo ---- IRAN girls high school
94
« on: September 08, 2009, 09:58:41 PM »
Dil Ka Connection Miladein Daddy Internet Laga Dein Mujhe Aaya Mail Dostoun Ka Kab Lagay Ga Itna Bata Dein > Homework Pura Hota Nahi Raat Ko Mein Sota Nahi Jab Mood Ho Parhai Ka Homework Koi Hota Nahi. > Net Bhi Hai Kamaal Cheez Bas Aati Ho Agar Chalani Keys Waisay To Bohot Hai Kaam Is Kay Par Chatting Pe Lagti Nahi Fees. > Aap Kehte Hain Mein Shor Machaon Ga Try Karo Mein Naraz Na Kar Paon Ga >Mein God Promise Karta Hun Net Aap Ke Saunay Ke Baad Lagaun Ga. > Saheli Nahi MeriHaan Dost Hi Hotay Hain Who Saray Ke Saray School Mein Hi Sotay Hain Raat To Guzarti Hai Net Par Typing Kartay Subha Bhi Chat Room Mein Hi Hotay Hain. > Ladkian Bhi Kamaal Hoti Hain Ghar Pe Apni Misaal Hoti Hain >Saara Kaam Khatam Karkay Das Bajay Saday Naal Hoti Hain. > Ab To Mujhe Internet Lagadein Meri Bhi Mauj Karadein Mein Bhi Dhondta Hun Cyber Bahoo Daddy Internet Laga Dein...
95
« on: September 08, 2009, 08:24:54 AM »
:
96
« on: September 08, 2009, 08:03:08 AM »
Very nice story don't Miss to Read it.
An elderly man in Mumbai calls his son in New York and says, 'I hate to ruin your day son, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are getting a divorce; 35 years of marriage... and that much misery is enough!' 'Dad, what are you talking about?' the son screams. 'We can't stand the sight of each other any longer,' the old man says. 'We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Hong Kong and tell her!' Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. 'Like heck they're getting divorced,' she shouts, 'I'll take care of this.'
She calls Mumbai immediately, and screams at the old man, 'You are not getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then , don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR??' and she hangs up.
The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. 'Okay', he says,
'It's all set. They're both coming for Diwali and paying their own airfare!!'
MORAL: No man / woman is busy in this world all 365 days. The sky is not going to fall down if you take few days LEAVE and meet your dear ones.
OFFICE WORK IS NOT EVERYTHING IN LIFE and MONEY MAKING IS NOT EVERYTHING IN LIFE.
97
« on: September 08, 2009, 07:55:29 AM »
The Organs of your body have their sensory touches at the bottom of your foot, if you massage these points you will find relief from aches and pains as you can see the heart is on the left foot.
Typically they are shown as points and arrows to show which organ it connects to. It is indeed correct since the nerves connected to these organs terminate here. This is covered in great details in Acupressure studies or textbooks. God created our body so well that he thought of even this. He made us walk so that we will always be pressing these pressure points and thus keeping these organs activated at all times. So, keep walking...
98
« on: September 08, 2009, 07:42:14 AM »
Newton 's Method:
Let, the lion catch you.
For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.
Implies you caught lion. ************ ********
Einstein Method:
Run in the direction opposite to that of the lion.
Due to higher relative velocity, the lion will also run faster and will get tired soon.
Now you can trap it easily. ************ ********
Software Engineer Method:
Catch a cat and claim that your testing has proven that its a Lion.
If anyone comes back with issues tell that you will upgrade it to Lion.
************ ********
Indian Police Method:
Catch any animal and interrogate it & torture it to accept that its a lion .
************ ********
Rajnikanth Method :
Keep warning the lion that u may come and attack anytime.
The lion will live in fear and die soon in fear itself.
************ ********
Jayalalitha Method:
Send Police commissioner Muthukaruppan around 2AM and kill it, while it's sleeping ! ************ ********
Manirathnam Method (director):
Make sure the lion does not get sun light and put the lion in a dark room with a single candle lighted.
Keep murmuring something in its ears.
The lion will be highly irritated and commit suicide. ************ ********
Karan Johar Method (director):
Send a lioness into the forest.
Our lion and lioness fall in love with each other.
Send another lioness in to the forest, followed by another lion.
First lion loves the first lioness and the second lion loves the 2nd lioness.
But 2nd lioness loves both lions.
Now send another lioness (third) into the forest.
You don't understand right... ok....read it after 15 yrs, then also u wont! ************ ********
Yash Chopra method (director):
Take the lion to Australia or US.. and kill it in a good scenic location. ************ ********
Govinda method:
Continuously dance before the lion for 5 or 6 days. The Lion will drop dead just watching! ************ ********
Menaka Gandhi method:
Save the lion from a danger and feed him with some vegetables continuously. ************ ********
George bush method:
Link the lion with Osama bin laden and shoot him!!!
************ ********
Ravi Shastri method:
Ask the lion to bowl at u.
U bat for 200 balls and score 1 run
Lion tired and surrenders
99
« on: September 08, 2009, 07:37:41 AM »
crashed, only a monkey who was traveling in the plane was left alive. Fortunately the monkey was intelligent enough to understand our language and reply in actions. The officials went to see the monkey in the hospital and had a talk with the monkey.
Officer: "When the plane took off what were the travelers doing?" Monkey: "Tying their belts" Officer: "What were the air hostesses doing?" Monkey: "Saying Hello! Good morning!" Officer: "What were the pilots doing?" Monkey: "Checking the system" Officer: "What were you doing?" Monkey: "Looking for my people"
Officer: "After 10' minutes what were the travelers doing?" Monkey: "Having beverages and snacks" Officer: "What were the air hostesses doing?" Monkey: "Serving the travelers" Officer: "What were the Pilots doing?" Monkey: "Handling the steering" Officer: "What were you doing?" Monkey: "Eating & throwing"
Officer: "After 30 minutes what were the travelers doing?" Monkey: "Some were sleeping and some were reading" Officer: "What were the air hostesses doing?" Monkey: "Make up" Officer: "What were the pilots doing?" Monkey: "Handling the steering" Officer: "What were you doing?" Monkey: "Nothing"
Officer: "Just before plane crash what were the travelers doing?" Monkey: "All were sleeping" Officer: "What were the pilots doing?" Monkey: "Handling the air hostess" Officer: What were you doing? Monkey: Handling the steering!!!! !
No more Questions!!! !!!!!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
100
« on: September 08, 2009, 07:35:35 AM »
He's Gone The one I love The one I admire Who puts my hopes to fire My hero, the one who sets my heart in desire He guided me He pushed me to achieve But after all this he leaves The one I cherish the one who set my goals Then he goes He's gone Why did this have to happen Why did he have to hit the road with out him I’m a sunken boat I have his memories, His childhood, a part of his life... Now he has a wife. He's gone.
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