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Topics - иαωту мυи∂α

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1
Jokes Majaak / Apna punjab di katiala shayeri for his ex-girlfriend
« on: October 02, 2015, 12:35:26 PM »
Ni jinne tu mere dil de totte kite aa,
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bach k rahi unne hi tere karu.. :D: :D: :D:

2
Jokes Majaak / Jatt mandir vich
« on: October 01, 2015, 02:33:55 AM »

Mandir ch ik jatt giya,

Lok bhajan ga rahe c,
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Darshan de Gariban nu,Darshan de Gariban nu...
Jatt di nooh da naam v Darshan kaur c ,
Jatt nu gussa aa gya, te oh Bhajan gaun lagga.
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Darshan haigi meri bahu.
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oh tan mere munde di rahu
baaki gal nasiba di,
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ewe kive Gariba di
 :D: :D: :D: :D: :D: :D: :D: :D:

3
Shayari / Punjabi Janta di party...
« on: January 19, 2015, 05:07:23 AM »
Mittra ne pj te jawani gaalti,
Ese hi khusi ch asi rakhi party,
Pawan te ghaint  ne apna disco DJ la leya,
Apurv chori-chori GABBY de sare naan kha geya,
Gujjar ne bina aase-paase dekh gabby nu lma pa leya,

Sab nu nachane da chadea bhukaar c,
Shalla te preet talli ho k maarde dakaar c
anoop, amitoz te noor chadiya chubare c,
Kinu, sand te gurlaal huni vi maarde ucchi-ucchi laalkare c,
Sab nu khaan peen di puri khull c,
Japneet, taur te reet gill goll-gappe dekh gaiya dull c,


sania te cali5aban huna te chat papri te dita jorr c,
princi nu vi  te garam garam samoseys  di sakhat lorr c,
Kursia te tables da vi appan kita parband c,
DISCO DJ wale vi kraunde puri dhan dhan c,

Ladli aman te sim grewal nu vi lagi jorra di bukh c,
paneer de pakode khatam hon da vi  lga bahuta dukh c,
Eni ki gal nu ehna ne dil te la leya,
Dekhdea hi dekhdea ehna gusse ch halwai apne punjab naal panga pa leya,
Bread de pakode de msa ehne apni jaan shadai c,
Binna gallo waddu di pe jani ladai c.
DJ disco di vi puri chadai c :D:

Kise paase sholle-bhature te kite paye daal-chaul c,
Thale nawty hath kulfi dekh amitoz de painde haul c,
Dekhdea hi dekhdea ehne chubare ton maar deti  shaal c,
rabb di kirpa naal bach gai eh vaal-vaal c,
DJ Disco wale hale tak vi kari jande kamaal c,


Shaal maaran di sakeem ehne layi bahut seyani aa,
bhajj k nawty  nu aa khendi "hayee mein vi kulfi khani aa" :D:
Baki sari janta kha pi k te bhangre pa k rajj gai,
Nawty ton akh bacha, eh kulfi wala khali matka apni scooty te rakh bhaj gai.




:laugh: :D: :D: :D: :laugh:

Sare active members nu include karan di kosish kiti aa je koi reh gea hove ta sorry :) [/size]














 

4
Jokes Majaak / Pj da School Part 6
« on: January 17, 2015, 04:03:10 AM »
sab ton pehlan tan big thanks to Anoop kaur for helping me out on this joke for past 3 days and jaldi ton pehlan pehlan hurry up kar k post karan waste sir khaan lai :D: :D: :D: ......thanku noopiye :hugg: :hugg:

joke es war thoda jeha lamba hai es war so araam te tasali naal baith k padeo   :pagel: :superhappy:




ENJOY!!! ENJOY!! ENJOY! ENJOY!! ENJOY!!!



Teacher: Noor K
Students: pawan,Anoop, Kinnu, amitoz , gabby (a.k.a katal bai) , gurlaal, tharki preet_luv
=========================================================================


class start ton 10 mins pehlan...

Pawan brah khush ho k, shala maarda hoya class ch aaunda aa te anoop nu waaj maarda aa

Pawan: Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooopiiiii  :happy: :happy:

Anoop:  :worried: tuttpenyaa!! aaundea hi sang paadan beh gea tu. Kehdi khusi ch bhangre paunda aa reha aa mar janea.

Pawan: khusi wali gal eh aa ki  mein passcode wala nma cycle leya  :love: :love:  :happy:

Anoop: hayeee ve tutpenya  :wow: menu vi passcode das de cycle apne da mein vi jhoote le laugi kadde  8-> 8->

Pawan:  :stopit: nah mein nahi dasna  :banana:

(thoda chir pawan da sirr khaan ton baad anoop esto passcode kadwa lendi aa)

Pawan: Cycle da passcode 4444 hai per tenu mein  eh nahi dasna ki kehra 4 pehlan aauna te kehda 4 baad ch :hehe:

Anoop:  :shutup: Daffa hona nah hove tan!! :slap: :slap: :slap:


ene chir nu PJ school ch nmi bharti hoi teacher NOOR K coffee da cup chak k kahli kahli ch

bacheo ajj mera pehlan din hon kar k  tuhadi haazri cancel per koi jana mere ik shotte jahe swaal da answer dave ki Island kisnu khende aa??


eh gal sun k sari class da sab ton hon haar student kinnu jawab den lai khada ho janda aa....

Kinnu: madam ji!! island is shota jeha zameen da tukda surrounded by water except one side!!

Madam Noor : which side??

Kinnu: madam ji!!! top side

  chal side te hath khare kar k khara ho ja  :thaa: :thaa:

ene nu gurlaal bhja bhja class ch late aaunda aa te darda-darda apni seat te baith janda aa

Noor K: koi jana menu dasse ki abraham lincoln da janam kado hoya c??

(picho kinnu bolda hoya: oyee laalea apne hath bahan tikkhiyaa kar le....

Gurlaal: madam ji!! 1809 vich  :5:

madam noor: shabash mera putt :blah: te hun eh das vi das de naal hi ki 1819 ch ki hoya c?

Gurlaal : 1819 vich madam ji!! ummmmm  :idk:  :thinking: :thinking: :thinking:......... oh haan sach!! madam ji!!!! 1819 vich lincoln 10 saala da hoya c  :banana:  :excited:


Madam noor ehde wal gusse naal dekh di aa te ........darda-darda gurlaal chup kar k kinnu naal hath khare kar k khara ho janda aa.....:laugh: :laugh:

amitoz ajj fer side te baith k nak nu jeeba la k loon check karan ch mast c....:D: :D:

Madam noor: Nah mera nonna putt !! eda gande kam nahi karide school vich aa ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, te mere ik question da answer de ki microsoft excel ki hai te eh kehre kam aaunda aa??

Amitoz : Madam ji eh Surf Excel walea da nava product aa te es naal kapda jada wadhia nikharda aa!! :D: :D:

Madam Noor: hayee oyee mereya rabba !!! loon check karwa karwa ehnu pehlan nalo vi jada duffer kar bna dita tu :pray: chal tu ohna naal ja k khari ho ja!!

Amitoz (sadial jahi boothi bna k) : mam ji kinnu naal ja gurlaale naal?? :sad:

Madam noor: nahi bahar!!

ene nu apna chotti da gabbru a.k.a  gabby vi bhjja bhjja class aa warda aa :D: :D:

oyee makhanea jeheya hun tu kahto late aaya :thaa:  :anger: :anger:

Gabby: oh madam ji!! mere late aaun da kaaran oh school de bahar lga board aa :nono:

Madam noor k : tere late hon da te bahar lagge board da ki relation aa?? :wait:

Gabby: Madam us board te likhya c ki "aage school hai kirpa kar k holi-holi jao"  :blah:

Madam Noor k: mere naal bahlia chlakiya karan di lodh nahi  :shutup: :slap: chal tu v ohna naal hath khare kar k kasrat kar le bahan apniya di :whew:


Pawan (darda darda): Madam ji can i go to bathroom really quick ?? it's coming on his way very fastly and silently :D: :D:

(bahro amitoz boldi aa........madam ji aa noopi ton vi kuch push lao    :cry: :huh:

Madam noor : chall anoop beta tu menu Blind Bird de spelling das de  :smile:

Anoop: madam ji!! blind bird de spelling??? ummmm  :wait: (ruk-ruk k kl- kla letter boldi aa) B....L.....N....D B...r...D  :whew: :happy:

Madam Noor k: bird diya 2 "I" kithe aa??  :slap:

Anoop: kive de madam ho tusi?? :surp: eh tan koi jana v das dao ki  je Bird hi blind hai tan "I" kitho huniya vich :D: :D:

Madam Noor k: Chal  tu vi bahar khar ja hath khari kar k!!

aakhri swaal preet beta tere lai aa je tu isda jawab sahi dita tan tere naal-naal sare jane apniya apniya seats te aa k baith jaange.

preet_luv: otey mam ji!! 

Madam Noor: "ajj mein ik bahut hi sohni kudi dekhi" esda future tense bna k das menu!!

Preet_luv: koi gal nahi madam ji mein kal tak us kudi nu fasa lauga!!

isto pehlan Madam noor k isnu gusse ch aa k kuch khendi, eh vi chup chaap hath khare kar k kinnu hona naal khar janda aa


      :D: :laugh:
 


5
Jokes Majaak / Letter to bill gates from apna punjab...
« on: January 06, 2015, 02:58:27 AM »
Lao app sab nu jida ki pta hi hona aa ki thode din pehlan, APNE PUNJAB bai di job lagi c te pehle hi din ihne boss ton mahurat kadwa leya c.http://punjabijanta.com/jokes-majaak/apna-punjab-di-navi-job/ Bas boss di gal nu dil te la k ehne microsoft de CEO nu chitthi likh k apne dil di garmi kadi puri...



Dear Bill Gates Sir,

I have some questions to ask.

1). The keyboard alphabets are not in order. When will you launch the correct version keyboard

2) there is START button, but nothing to STOP.

3) We learnt MS WORD, when will you launch MS SENTENCE?

4) There is recycle bin, but no rescooter bin, why ?

5) And finaly a personal question. Why is your name GATES even though You sell WINDOWS?


Natija eh nikalea ki Gate ni ehdi chitthi parh k apni position ton asteefa de dita :D: :D: :D: :D:

6
Jokes Majaak / PJ da School part 4
« on: December 21, 2014, 04:23:00 AM »
lao ji pure sadde tin saala pissho PJ school da session dubara shuru hon lga aa.....chawaan sajjan te sajjania pehlan de 3 sessions te nigga maar sakde aa

http://punjabijanta.com/jokes-majaak/pj-da-school/
http://punjabijanta.com/jokes-majaak/pj-school-part-2/
http://punjabijanta.com/jokes-majaak/pj-da-school-part-3/

ENJOY!!!!! :superhappy: :superhappy: :superhappy:


Teacher: gujjar
Students: myself ghaint, apurv, amitoz kaur, anoop kaur,  apna punjab, Preet luv .
====================================================================

gujjar haazri lgaun lagea hunda aa

Gujjar: Roll no. 1

myself ghaint: (ronda hoya) : Hazirr ji   :cry:

Gujjar : han oye tu savere savere ki pitt seyapa paya aa  :thaa: :anger:

Myself ghaint : maaster ji!! maaster ji!!   mein nah, mein nah savere savere chaa de naal bread khaan lagea c..........jado nah mein bread nu cha ch paya tan sari cha bread chus k le geya  :omyeyes:

Gujjar: oho es vich ron wali kehri gal aa.......aage ton cha pehlan pi lai te bread baad ch kha lai  :happy: :D: chal mera putt hun tikk k beh ja!!  :banana:

myself ghaint: ok maaster ji


Class vich jine vi students hunde aa gujjar ohna di hazzri la k vehla ho janda hai te dekhda ki amitoz kaur bar bar apne nakk nu jeeb la rahi hundi hai :loll:

Gujjar: ami tu nakk nu jeeb la k ki sidh karna chaundi hai?? :waitin:

amitoz: oh nah nah master ji :he: mein tan bas mara jeha loon check kardi pai c 

Gujjar: tu bas padi nah, sari ummar nak nu jeeba la la k loon hi check kardi rahi  :facepalm:

Amitoz : 

chalo class da koi smart bacha "BIJJLI" word use kar k ik sentence bna k dasse

anoop:  :me: :me: mein dasdi aa master ji................ (thoda chir shochan ton baad) :thinking: :Kamre vich hanera aa  :excited:

Gujjar:  :stopit: is sentence vich bijli kithe aa?? :slap:

anoop:  :worried: master ji bilji ta gai hoi aa. :D: :D:

shabash tere,,,,,,,,,,,bahut khoob. tu hi es desh da kuch nah kuch sudaar karugi eda da parh likh k  X_X X_X

Preet_luv: waddi padakan!!!

Gujjar tu dandiyaa kadno hat ja gadeernea jeha tera no. vi lag jana thode time tak

anoop: kra lai besti   :tongue:

ene chir nu apurv te ajay (apna punjab bai) daude daude class ch aaunde aa

Gujjar: tusi dove jane late kahto aaye ho ajj??

Apurv: maater ji maater ji.............mein nah raati supne vich canada geya hoya c ji tan kar k mere kolo savere time naal akh nahi khuli  :hehe:

te ajay (apna punjab) tu kive late ho geya??

Ajay: mein ehnu airport te chadan geya hoya c  :blah: :blah:


eni gal sun k preet luv class vich jahaj ban k uddan lag janda aa.....

oyee kaka urre aa tenu mein pehlan hi keha c ki tera no. lag jana jaldi. jehra mein tenu essay likhan lai keha c oh likhya ja nahi??

preet_luv :problem: : nahi master ji essay nahi likhea mein.........per.......per.....per mein tuhade lai ik bahut sohna shayer jaroor likhya :here:

Gujjar: chal shayer suna de fer.....

preet luv:
lao master ji badde  hi dukhi dill naal  arzz kita janda hai ji...... :Bye:

sotti utte sapp charda....

(Background ch sari class "wah wah: boldi hoi)

sotti utte sapp charda,,
sotti utte sapp charda,

master dia 3 kudia sab to waddi utte mein marda

gujjar : khad ja oyee teri ta mein  :thaa: :thaa: :thaa:

sari class: :D:  :rofl: :D: :rofl: :D:  :rofl: :D: :rofl: :D:  :rofl: :D:  :rofl:

Preet_luv:



7
Shayari / time badal geya,,,nazare badal gaye.
« on: December 19, 2014, 05:58:08 PM »
time badal geya, nazare badal gaye
time badal geya, nazare badal gaye,
kuck lok thore badal gaye te kuch saare badal gaye  :ok:
purane mitti de ghar te nave chubare badal gaye
time badal geya te nazare.....

kai sanu app shad turr gaye,
rokdea ohna nu sade thaleo pair vi khurr gaye,
holi holi oh ho akhia ton door gaye.
bina gallo kad oh sada kasoor gaye,
armaana sadea da oh kar katal turr gaye
kai thode badal gaye te kai sare badal gayee....
kache kothea wale ghare te chubare badal gaye
oh chubare badal gaye...


jo dil vich aaya ohi likh dita pta nahi kive sound kar reha :pray:

8
Jokes Majaak / apurv te PJ chef apna punjab
« on: December 19, 2014, 05:09:36 PM »
pichale kaafi dina ton apurv PJ da karamjit anmol aalua wale prauthe kha kha k akk gea c te ik din ehne mungi-masran di daal bnaun di sochi.....

daal bnaunde hoyee ihne chef apna punjab kolo pushea ki Loon kithe peya aa

Chef ajay: Loon tan hai ni yr ghare  :worried:

apurv :  :anger: nah fir mein ki pawa daal vich

chef ajay: (thoda chir sochan ton baad)  :thinking:  colgate pa de daal ch. usde vich namak bahut hunda hai

:D: :D: :D: :D: :D:

9
Jokes Majaak / apna punjab (ajay) di navi job
« on: December 19, 2014, 04:55:33 PM »
apna punjab  nu navi navi job milli
pehle ee din isne 11 ghante computer te kam kar k company di pichle sare record torh dite
isda boss ehda kam dekh k bahut khush hoya te pushea...
ajj tu sare din computer te baith k ki karda reha..
apna punjab:sir,keyborad di sari a,b,c agge pichhe lagi hoyi c osnu theek karda reha  :banana:

boss:  :anger: :anger:

:D: :D: :D: :D: :D: :D:

10
Shayari / Twitter te baithi shalle di tweetan wali.... :p
« on: December 16, 2014, 05:09:16 AM »
Twitter de baithi honi shalle di tweetan wali,
Kalam ehdi cho nikalde pyaar de geeta wali,
Ohde jaan baad shalla sada kalla ho gea,
 Kamla dil ehda ro-ro jhalla ho gea,
Us gulab de rang wali  nu adhi adhi raat tak  vi  chete karda rehnda hai,
Jad photo ohdi nu ghut seene naal lai eh leh behnda hai,
Fir sochda hau ki zindgi kini rangeen hundi mil jandi oh sachiya preetan wali......
shalle mein nahi eh amitoz ne keha hai ki twitter te rehandi aa teri tweetan wali :hehe:
Othe hi baithi aa bhabi sadi tweetan wali... :D:


11
Shayari / Gujjar te goru (ek anokhi prem katha)
« on: December 15, 2014, 04:12:52 AM »
Gujjar sada goru bina ekala ho geya,
Chat room ch bottlan torh torh eh jhalla ho geya,
Goru de jan da gum gujjar ne dil apne te la leya huna,
Ene nu goru ne koi nma munda fasa leya huna
Koi nma munda fasa leya huna :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:


Kise ne serious le k hasna nahi oyeee :hehe:

12
Shayari / Chamkila te babbu mann...
« on: December 10, 2014, 01:22:33 AM »
lines likhiya nu pave 2 weeks ho gaye hon per jado v parda aa feeling nmiya wargi aaundi aa :loll:


Akh chadi te much kharri rakhan de shokeen aa,
tu sundi hovegi beiber te beyonce de gaane gaddi ch wajja k kade kaddai ,
per  yaar hona da chamkila te babbu mann wajaun da routine aa.   buurraaaahhhhh :balle:

:superhappy:

13
Shayari / Dedicate to APNA PUNJAB bai (specially ohde janamdin lai)
« on: October 21, 2014, 03:06:40 AM »
Apna punjab bai de janam dihade te jeth de duphere wangu garama garam lines likhiya aa :hehe:  enjoyy!!! :banana:


Very very Happy bday tenu bai,
Savere uth pehlan ghar dea nu fateh bulai,
Fir ohna pairi hath lai te rabb da fir shukar manai,
Yaara mittra nu naal baith k shaam nu mehfil lai,
Us vich sanu sab nu bulai,
Cake katan wele happy bday wala geet gavage,
Fir taadia maar mombatiya bujawage te muh utte cream lavage, :loll:
Ewi dil jeha nah shotta kari bai tere lai asi change saare tohffe v leyamage, :D:
saaf-safaian kar k, vehla baith ehna tohfea nu tu app hi kholi jayi,
Janam din diya bahut bahut mubarka hon bai.



14
Shayari / Kudiya diya feelingan....
« on: October 19, 2014, 02:27:11 AM »
Kuddiyaa diya romantic feelings nu dheyaan vich rakhde hoye ,ohna de point of view ton explain karan di ik shoti jahi kosish kiti aa. :hehe:  Aas karda han ki  pasand aaungiya lines :)

Boohe aage khari raha mein hasdi,
Chardi jawani hun rahi nah mere wasdi,
Sohne sajjna de aaun diya udeeka kardi rehandi aa,
Ohdi ek jhalak paun lai har wele mardi rehandi aa,
Nazaran  ch utaar lva apne us sohne dildaar nu,
Gani da manka bna k, ghut seene naal la k rakha apne  pyaar nu
Eda diya socha di duniya vich kho jandi,
Apne app naal galla kardi mein kamli ohdi hi ho jandi aa...
Ohdi Ho jandi aa.


15
Shayari / fun-shun karan aunde han ethe...
« on: September 19, 2014, 01:14:00 AM »
kade main stream te kade chat vich puri raunak lgaunde han,
per usto pehlan login kar sab nu sat sri akaal bulaunde aa,
fun-shun karan aunde han ethe galla bahliyaa fazool nahi karde,
dhake naal gal karan lai bahala kise nu majboor nahi karde,
jehra koi pyaar naal  bole usnu vi bula lainde haan,
bina gal ton koi aakad kare tan ohnu kharriya kharriya suna dinde haan,
yaaran velliya kaloolan kar apna te sab da man parchaida,
hase majak wali gal nu mittro kade dil te nahi laida......
dil te nahi laida..

16
News Khabran / R.I.P 9/11 victims
« on: September 11, 2014, 12:45:10 PM »

R.I.P to all the 3000  victims who died on this day 13 years ago in the attacks 9/11 on world trade center NYC, US and pentagon in washington DC. rabb ohna saria di aatma nu shanti bakshe :rabb:  :pray:

17
Shayari / few lines dedicate to sania (a.k.a my crime partner lol)
« on: August 29, 2014, 01:17:16 AM »
sania a.k.a my crime partner ik din kuch eda >> noodle shak rahi c te baad ch jo noodle ne isda haal kita oh tusi app parh lao. :hehe:

noodle ne chapead maari tan gal utte toya pe gea,
eni nazuk jahi jaan ne eda wadda dukh kive seh leya,
thoda sabar kita hunda tan  bach vi jandi,
noodlan wali plate kehra kite bhajji c jandi, :D:
eh sab dekh k chamcha vi akha malda reh gea,
noodle ne chpead maari tan ....

us toye ne beauty teri nu chaar chand la dite,
mundea de dila utte kehar macha dite,
kaiya nu ummra de rogg lga dite,
tenu dekh sara NY dil te hath rakh beh gea,
noodle ne chapead mari tan gal utte....


P.S: next time holi khai shano.....je kite doji gal te vi toya puwan de chakar ch tej tej khan lag gai tan ho sakda ki same side ik hor chapead wajj k dent pe jave.....is dent nu repair karan di cost tan insurance ne vi cover nahi karni
 

18
Shayari / kuch kam diya galla (new lines by me)
« on: August 20, 2014, 03:08:52 AM »
kuch k kam dia galla likhia ajj kal de time bare.
P.S: jida dimaag ch lines aaiya likh detiya....app hi das deo padh k kive diya lagiyaa...... ho sake te share vi kar leo fb te :loll:



aaukhe wele rabb nu nah yaad kariyee
maan satikaar sab da dilo kariye

utto-utto kade v nah mitthe baniye,
aakad shad gal pyaar naal sab di suniye,

dil vich...kadi v... kise lai nah khot rakhiye,
lorr pen te yaaran da na saath shadiye,

kise vi mussibat ton kadde nah darriyee..
galat raste da nah kade rah farriyee,

maare time te kise da nah saath shaddiye,
kise di dhee-bhen nu nah gaal kadiyee..

ucchi awaaj vich kade v  nah mara boliye,
kise di jakhma te ewe na loon dolliye.






19
Shayari / Ik din menu.....(new lines)
« on: August 17, 2014, 12:39:56 AM »
ik din Menu koi khenda geet likh,
Heer-ranjha, sassi-punnu huna di sachi preet likh,
Geet likhan lai tenu tere janam din te ik copy frah dinde han,
Mein keha geet tan mere kolo likh nahi huna,
Chalo isde bare ik shayer bna dinde han.

:D: :D: :D:

20
Shayari / ethe har koi kruna chaunda...
« on: August 13, 2014, 03:37:08 PM »
kuch lines ohna loka de lai likhan di try kiti aa jehre rabb kolo kuch na kuch na mangde rehande aa.... te baad vich sab kuch milan te rabb nu bhul jande aa ....

Ethe har koi krauna chaunda apni balle-balle,
Puri duniya te sikka sade naam da challe,
Daulat-shaurat sab kuch milan de baavjood jo bhul jande rabb nu,
Fir eho jahe time te kuch nah rehanda na palle,
Jad rabb guddi chada k suttda ohna nu asmano thalle.

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