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1
Shayari / Lakh Lahntaan Eho Jeheyan Di Yaari Nu
« on: September 20, 2012, 04:40:43 AM »

Ajj Kal Da Pyar Bs Kujh Din Da,Ethe Pal Ch Badldey Yaar Dekhe
Bahut Hi Komal Te Jubano Mithe, Hatthi Dinde Yaar Nu Jehar Dekhe

Kasma Vaade Sab Kehn Dian Gallan Ne Bahute, Todhde Kaul Karrar Dekhe
Masoom Jehe Cherhe Jo Change Lagde Ne Ehna Piche Chupe Gaddar Dekhe

Saude Dilan De Bs Jo Krde Ne Main Eho Jehe Khariddaar Dekhe
Pehlan "Jaan" Jaan Kehnde, Ik Pal Door Na Rehnde Gaira Piche Oh Badlde Saar Dekhe

Jisma Di Bhukh Ch Zamir Waichde Ne Main Dilon Tenu Chahuna, Eh Kehnde Hazzar Dekhe
Ban Ke Hamraaz Diljani Kujh Lokan Nu Dasde Firde Raaz Dekhe

Jo Dinde Duhaiyin Pyar Dian Ohi Ishq De Naam Te Lutde Shre Bazzar Dekhe
Jehre Ik De Ban Ke Rehnde Oh Anjaan Khahunde Jehre Krde Ne Harek Naal Time Pass, Ohna De Hunde Satkaar Dekhe

Khush Rehnde Bahutea Yaraan Wale Ik Piche Kyi Ronde Zro-Zaar Dekhe
Lakh Lahntaan Eho Jeheyan Di Yaari Nu Dukh Dinde Ho Ke Yaar Ghamkhaar Dekhe





2
Birthdays / Happy B'day Sarpanch Saab :)
« on: September 17, 2012, 06:38:07 AM »

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SARPANCH SAAB

Hoping dat ur day will b as special as u are and may d luv ya hve shown 2 others return to ya multiplied :)



3

Please cover your head before reading


ਸਦਾ ਅਕਲ ਲਿਵ ਰਹੈ ਕਰਨ ਸਿਉ ਇਛਾ ਚਾਰਹ ॥

Sadhaa Akal Liv Rehai Karan Sio Eishhaa Chaareh ||

सदा अकल लिव रहै करन सिउ इछा चारह ॥

Your mind remains lovingly attuned to the Lord forever; You do whatever you desire.



ਦ੍ਰੁਮ ਸਪੂਰ ਜਿਉ ਨਿਵੈ ਖਵੈ ਕਸੁ ਬਿਮਲ ਬੀਚਾਰਹ ॥

Dhraam Sapoor Jio Nivai Khavai Kas Bimal Beechaareh ||

द्रुम सपूर जिउ निवै खवै कसु बिमल बीचारह ॥

Like the tree heavy with fruit, You bow in humility, and endure the pain of it; You are pure of thought.



ਇਹੈ ਤਤੁ ਜਾਣਿਓ ਸਰਬ ਗਤਿ ਅਲਖੁ ਬਿਡਾਣੀ ॥

Eihai Thath Jaaniou Sarab Gath Alakh Biddaanee ||

इहै ततु जाणिओ सरब गति अलखु बिडाणी ॥

You realize this reality, that the Lord is All-pervading, Unseen and Amazing.




59264 ਸਵਈਏ ਮਹਲੇ ਦੂਜੇ ਕੇ (ਭਟ ਕਲ੍ਯ੍ਯ) ਗੁਰੂ ਗ੍ਰੰਥ ਸਾਹਿਬ : ਅੰਗ ੧੩੯੨ ਪੰ. ੨
Savaiye (praise of Guru Angad Dev ji) Bhatt Kalh ji






4

Please cover your head before reading



ਕਾਮ ਕ੍ਰੋਧ ਮਦ ਮਤਸਰ ਤ੍ਰਿਸਨਾ ਬਿਨਸਿ ਜਾਹਿ ਹਰਿ ਨਾਮੁ ਉਚਾਰੀ ॥

Kaam Krodhh Madh Mathasar Thrisanaa Binas Jaahi Har Naam Ouchaaree ||

काम क्रोध मद मतसर त्रिसना बिनसि जाहि हरि नामु उचारी ॥

Lust, anger, egotism, jealousy and desire are eliminated by chanting the Name of the Lord.



ਇਸਨਾਨ ਦਾਨ ਤਾਪਨ ਸੁਚਿ ਕਿਰਿਆ ਚਰਣ ਕਮਲ ਹਿਰਦੈ ਪ੍ਰਭ ਧਾਰੀ ॥

Eisanaan Dhaan Thaapan Such Kiriaa Charan Kamal Hiradhai Prabh Dhhaaree ||

इसनान दान तापन सुचि किरिआ चरण कमल हिरदै प्रभ धारी ॥

The merits of cleansing baths, charity, penance, purity and good deeds,
are obtained by enshrining the Lotus Feet of God within the heart.




ਸਾਜਨ ਮੀਤ ਸਖਾ ਹਰਿ ਬੰਧਪ ਜੀਅ ਧਾਨ ਪ੍ਰਭ ਪ੍ਰਾਨ ਅਧਾਰੀ ॥

Saajan Meeth Sakhaa Har Bandhhap Jeea Dhhaan Prabh Praan Adhhaaree ||

साजन मीत सखा हरि बंधप जीअ धान प्रभ प्रान अधारी ॥

The Lord is my Friend, my Very Best Friend, Companion and Relative.
God is the Sustenance of the soul, the Support of the breath of life.






59173 ਸਵਈਏ ਸ੍ਰੀ ਮੁਖਬਾਕ੍ਯ੍ਯ (ਮ: ੫) ਗੁਰੂ ਗ੍ਰੰਥ ਸਾਹਿਬ : ਅੰਗ ੧੩੮੯ ਪੰ. ੨
Savaiye Guru Arjan Dev ji




5
ਸੋਈ ਪੁਰਖੁ ਧੰਨੁ ਕਰਤਾ ਕਾਰਣ ਕਰਤਾਰੁ ਕਰਣ ਸਮਰਥੋ ॥

Soee Purakh Dhhann Karathaa Kaaran Karathaar Karan Samarathho ||

सोई पुरखु धंनु करता कारण करतारु करण समरथो ॥

Blessed is the Primal Lord God, the Creator, the All-powerful Cause of causes.



ਸਤਿਗੁਰੂ ਧੰਨੁ ਨਾਨਕੁ ਮਸਤਕਿ ਤੁਮ ਧਰਿਓ ਜਿਨਿ ਹਥੋ ॥

Sathiguroo Dhhann Naanak Masathak Thum Dhhariou Jin Hathho ||

सतिगुरू धंनु नानकु मसतकि तुम धरिओ जिनि हथो ॥

Blessed is the True Guru, oh Nanak who placed His hand upon Your forehead.



ਤ ਧਰਿਓ ਮਸਤਕਿ ਹਥੁ ਸਹਜਿ ਅਮਿਉ ਵੁਠਉ ਛਜਿ ਸੁਰਿ ਨਰ ਗਣ ਮੁਨਿ ਬੋਹਿਯ ਅਗਾਜਿ ॥

Th Dhhariou Masathak Hathh Sehaj Amio Vutho Shhaj Sur Nar Gan Mun Bohiy Agaaj ||

त धरिओ मसतकि हथु सहजि अमिउ वुठउ छजि सुरि नर गण मुनि बोहिय अगाजि ॥

When He placed His hand upon Your forehead, then the celestial nectar began to rain down in torrents; the gods and human beings, heavenly heralds and sages were drenched in its fragrance.



59240 ਸਵਈਏ ਮਹਲੇ ਦੂਜੇ ਕੇ (ਭਟ ਕਲ੍ਯ੍ਯ) ਗੁਰੂ ਗ੍ਰੰਥ ਸਾਹਿਬ : ਅੰਗ ੧੩੯੧ ਪੰ. ੩
Savaiye (praise of Guru Angad Dev ji )







6
Shayari / Baba Bulleh Shah di Kafi
« on: September 07, 2012, 12:04:29 PM »
Baba Bulleh Shah di Kafi
........................................

Parrh Parrh Aalim
Faazil Hoya
Kaddi Apney Aap noo Parrheya hi nahin
(Studying Baba Bulleh Shah's books over and over you want to be a learned man but you never study your innerself )[/i][/color][/b]
[/size][/font]

Jaa Jaa Warda Mandir Maseetaan
Kaddi Mun Apney Vich tun Wardeya ee Nahin
(you run to enter mosques and temples but you never enter into your innerself)

Ainwayn Roz Shaitaan dey naal Larda
Kaddi Nafs Apney Naal Lardeya ee nahin
(you fight Satan in vain daily but fighting your ego you care not )

Bulleh Shah Aasmaanin Uddiyaan Phardaa
Jaidha Ghar Baitha Ohnun Phardeya ee Nahin
(Baba Bulleh Shah says this ..you run after what you've lost but push aside what you've got)

- Bulleh Shah's Poetry

7
Pics / mrng view at khalsa clg amritsar
« on: September 05, 2012, 04:23:27 AM »
Balihari kudrat vasseya
at khalsa college amritsar - (morning view)  8->



8
PJ Games / PJ Best Joke Teller Competition [2012]
« on: June 12, 2012, 04:40:50 PM »

PJ BEST JOKE TELLER 2012

A day without laughter is a day wasted - Charlie Chaplin


Sat shri akaal ji sabh nu,
as we all know that laughter is a strong medicine for mind and body .. it makes life more fun and better!!  :happy: sooo our new Competition will be ' PJ BEST JOKE TELLER'
All you have to do is .. record any joke/funny poetry in your voice and upload it.







Rules:
 » You must read/sing the Joke or Funny poetry in YOUR OWN voice.
 » You are allowed to use background music or any other sound effects.
 » Keep it clean!


Hamesha di tarah, dhayan ch rakheyo ki tuhadi entry kise nu offend na kare te family oriented hove.
Please apni entry wich koi v eho jehi gal na kareo jehde kar k kise da dil dukhe.


Apniya entries nu PJ downloads section de BEST JOKE TELLER 2012   ch upload kareyo

upload here

So lets all come together.. share some jokes and make one another laugh ^_^

Doesn't have to be your own joke..!


9
PJ Games / Voting: Footwear Competition 2012 - MALE
« on: May 17, 2012, 10:32:46 AM »
Sat shri akaal ji sabh nu,

As we are done with the entries for the *Sohni Jutti Competition*, now time has come to open the voting for this Competition.
Please be fair in voting, don't just vote for your friends - they all deserve a fair chance!

Rule: You must have 100 posts in order for your vote to count.

Main sare participants da teh dillon dhanvaad kardi aa
and ek gal yaad dilona chauhndi aa ki there will be 2 sets of winners: ones picked by users and ones picked by judges

haanji chalo hojao shuru te pao apni-apni keemti votes :)
Mundea ne ta changi rounka laya  :happy:








WAHLA (Sareef Jatt)




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Jatt Yamla






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©odєnamє 47 (Rahul)




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Toxic (livelifejattsize)






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Nek Singh (Gill_SS)




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Nav Braich (navi0019)






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ਕਰਮਵੀਰ ਸਿੰਘ (Karam)





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Funnier_boy







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Pawan ( dhillon and aujla)







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Apurv






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Grenade Singh







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Gagan











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Gabbar Singh







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Nawty Munda (harmeet)







10
PJ Games / Voting: Footwear Competition 2012 - FEMALE
« on: May 17, 2012, 09:23:34 AM »
Sat shri akaal ji sabh nu,

As we are done with the entries for the *Sohni Jutti Competition*, now time has come to open the voting for this Competition.
Please be fair in voting, don't just vote for your friends - they all deserve a fair chance!

Rule: You must have 100 posts in order for your vote to count.

Main sare participants da teh dillon dhanvaad kardi aa
and ek gal yaad dilona chauhndi aa ki there will be 2 sets of winners: ones picked by users and ones picked by judges

chalo hojao shuru te pao apni-apni keemti votes :)

==============================================================================================================





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QαiηααƬ (Nigz)






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Simarri



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Sania





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BeBbo Punjaban (Lado)






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Tinde lehlo (nikki heer)






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Hasmukh (ankhi punjaban)





11
Birthdays / HAPPY B'DAY QAINAAT
« on: May 16, 2012, 02:23:01 AM »
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE SWEETEST GIRL ON PJ
QαiηααƬ (Nigah)

Happy Birthday, and may all the wishes and dreams you dream today turn to reality  :hug:



♪ღ♪*•.¸¸¸.•*¨¨*•.¸¸¸.•*•♪ღ♪¸.•*¨¨*•.¸¸¸.•*•♪ღ♪•*
♪ღ♪░H░A░P░P░Y░ B░I░R░T░H░D░A░Y░░♪ღ♪
*•♪ღ♪*•.¸¸¸.•*¨¨*•.¸¸¸.•*•♪¸.•*¨¨*•.¸¸¸.•*•♪ღ♪•«

Hoping that your day will be as special as you are

God bless you mein Schatziii, hab dich ganz doll lieb  :love:
 
  :hug:

12
Lok Virsa Pehchaan / PUNJABI FOLK DANCES
« on: May 15, 2012, 10:33:06 AM »
   DANCES

:balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle::balle:

It was in the jungles of Punjab where the first rays of civilization had appeared. In this respect Punjab is considered the motherland of dances. From tribals to the kings and eventually republics took shape. These changes left their seals on the sands of time and caused changes in culture also.

The exuberance and vitality of the people of Punjab are vigorously displayed in their folk dances. With the drum beat or to the tune of some other instrument of folk music, the energetic feet of the people of Punjab are spontaneously set in motion to give birth to a folk dance - an expression of the soul triumphant, an outburst of emotions.


MALE FOLK DANCES: 1. Bhangra 2. Jhummer 3. Luddi 4. Julli 5. Dankara 6. Dhumal
FEMALE FOLK DANCES: 1. Sammi 2. Giddha 3. Kikli


BHANGRA



The Bhangra is perhaps the most virile form of Indian Folk Dances. Springing from the land of five rivers, it abundantly reflects the vigor, the vitality, the leaven of exuberance, and the hilarity permeated among the rural folk by the promise of a bumper crop. The Bhangra season starts with the wheat sowing and then every full moon attracts teams of young men in every village who dance for hours in open fields. The dancers begin to move in a circle around the drummer, who now and then lifts the two sticks, with which he beats the drum, to beckon the dancers to a higher tempo of movement. They start with a slow movement of their feet. As the tempo increases, the hands, the feet and in fact the whole body comes into action. They whirl round and round bending and straightening their bodies alternatively, hopping on one leg, raising their hands, clapping with their handkerchiefs and exclaiming Bale Bale! Oh Bale Bale to inspire themselves and others to the abandon of the dance.


At intervals the dancers stop moving, but continue to beat the rhythm with their feet. One of the dancers come forward near the drummer and covering his left ear with his palm sings a boali or dholla, derived from the traditional folk songs of Punjab. Picking up the last lines, the dancers again start dancing with greater vigor.


In addition to a drum, chimta-musical tongs and burchu and sound of the beats from earthen vessels are used as accompanying instruments. The costume of a Bhangra dancer consists of a bright, colored Patka on the head, a lacha or lungi of the same color, a long tunic and a black or blue waistcoat and ghunghroos on the ankles. Some dancers also wear small rings (nuntian) in their ears.


When the wheat crop is nearing ripening, the breeze softly touches the surface of the golden crop creating a ripple and reckoning the sickle, when the hard labor of the farmer is about to bear fruit, it is time of rejoicing and merry making and through Bhangra their emotions find uninhibited and spontaneous expression of genuine happiness. The Bhangra season concludes with the Baisakhi fair when the wheat is harvested.

Bhangra is considered the king of dances. There are several styles of dancing Bhangra.

Sialkoti, Sheikhupuri, Tribal, Malwa, Majha. One of the Bhangra's moves is also akin to the moves of Shiv-Tandav dance, which is danced on one leg. Damru, hand-drum is also used in Bhangra which shows that folk dances and war dances have similar parentage.



JHUMMAR



The Jhummar is a dance of ecstasy. It is a living testimony of the happiness of men. Any time is Jhummar time especially during Melas, weddings and other major functions and celebrations. Performed exclusively by men, it is a common feature to see three generations - father, son and grandson - dancing all together. There are three main types of jhummar, each of which has a different mood, and is therefore suited to different occasionally, reason of its predominating mood.
This is also performed in a circle. The dancers dance around a single drummer standing in the center. It's costumes are the same as that of Bhangra. It is danced to the tune of emotional songs. The dance is without acrobatics. The movement of the arms only is considered its main forte. Toes are musically placed in front and backwards and turnings are taken to the right, sometimes the dancers place their one hand below the ribs on the left and gesticulate with the right hand. This dance does not tire out its performers and it is normally danced on moonlit nights in the villages away from the habitation. It is mostly danced by tribal Sikh professional acrobats and has yet not been owned by all Punjabis. The dancers of this dance let-off a sound, "dee dee" in tune with the beat of the dance which adds to its grace. This dance has also been integrated into Bhangra.


LUDDI



This is also a male dance of Punjab. It is danced to celebrate a victory in any field. Its costumes are simple. Only a loose shirt (kurta) and a loincloth are used. Some tie a turban, other the Patka which is somewhat like a scarf tied across the forehead, while still others join in bareheaded. This is also a dance of gay abandon. The performers place one hand at the back and the other before the face copying the movement of a snake's head. This is also danced with the drummer in the center but sometimes the dancers dance before a throng of people and keep moving forward also. This dance is more popular across the Sutlej and in Pakistan it is almost as popular as the Bhangra. This dance has an historical background and pertains to that moment in history when Punjabi Sardars had begun to rescue Indian women that used to be forcibly taken in the direction of Basra in Middle East.
This dance is also the dance of slow movements and some teachers by integrating it into Bhangra have finished its individual identity.



JALLI (m sorry, pic nahi labhi - je kise nu mile ta plzz add kr deo :)
It is a religious dance associated with Pirs and recluses and is generally danced in their hermitages (khangahs). This dance is performed mostly in a sitting posture; sometimes it is also danced round the grave of a preceptor. A single dancer can also perform this dance. Toes are tensed in this dance. The dancer holds a thick staff in his hands and he dances by revolving it. Normally black clothes are worn by the dancer, so is his head covered with black scarf. Sometimes, the murids (followers) also the tie ghungroos (Jingling bells) around their waists like the Bhangra dancers of yore. This dance is fast disappearing.


DHANKARA



At least two persons are required to perform this dance, though there is no upper limit. Like other male dances it is danced in circles. The dancers hold staffs of various colors in their hands. They dance as they ply their staffs in rhythm crossing them, with each other's. This dance is either performed at the common yards or in the vanguard of marriage processions to exhibit joy. Sometimes it is also called gatka dance (dance of the dum swords). Women also dance this dance but they do so separately and not in company with men. No special costumes are worn with it; only, sometimes the dancers tie a band around their waist. It is based on only a few movements but these movements are rather impressive. Its high point is achieved when dancers sit down and cross batons. Old people, young children and flexible young men all perform this dance.



DHUMALL



This folk dance also has not been able to achieve the popularity of Bhangra. Of course it is a male dance and, likewise, is danced in a circle. Drum is used as the accompanying instrument; its costumes are akin to Bhangra and Jhumar


SAMMI


The fairy dancers of the court of lord Indira are reputed to have taught the technique of Giddha and Sammi to the girls of this earth. The fairy which taught Giddha was known as Giddho while the one who taught Sammi was named as such. This kind of dance form is popular in Sandal Bar which now is in Pakistan. Sammi has not been able to gain popular acceptance and is breathing its last in the huts of the tribals. Women of Baazigars, Rai Sikhs, Lobanas and Sansi lot tribes dance in this medium. This is also danced in the privacy of women.


This women’s dance is also performed like ‘Giddha’. The dancers stand in a circle and swing their hands, bringing them up from the sides, right in front up to the chest level and clap: they take their hands down in accordance with a rythem and clap again. Repeating this gesture, they bend forward and clap again, and go round and round in a circle. As the rythem is maintained with the beat of the feet, various kinds of swinging movements are performed with the arms. Most of the gestures are confined to the movement of the arms, clicking and clapping. No instrument is required as an accompaniment to this dance. Rythem is kept up with the beating of the feet and clapping.
Special make-up is done by its performers. They knit their hair into thin plaits all over their head into intricate patterns and tie the remaining length of the hair in one full plait. In the middle of their head they fix a domed ornament shaped like an inverted lotus called phul-chowk or Suggiphul (flower of the crossings of the plaits). The performers wear a unisex kurta (male shirt) and the tehmet (lower cloth) and cover their head with a thick cloth of loose rectangular dimension, called 'Bhochhan'. Chutki is a frictional sound of single note created by pressing and then sIiding the thumb and the index or the middle finger and is used to keep the beat in this lance. The background song of this dance is also called sammi. This is also a dance of controlled movements. It is said that even the Devtas (angels) get inebriated while seeing this dance.


GIDDHA



The vitality of Bhangra can also be seen in the Giddha dance of the women of Punjab. This dance translates into gestures, bolian-verses of different length satirizing politics, the excesses committed by husbands, their sisters and mothers, loneliness of a young bride separated from her husband, evils of society or expressing guileless deep love.

The dance is derived from the ancient ring dance. One of the girls plays on the drum or 'dholki' while others form a circle. Some times even the dholki is dispensed with. While moving in a circle, the girls raise their hands to the level of their shoulders and clap their hands in unison. Then they strike their palms against those of their neighbors. Rhythm is generally provided by clapping of hands.

Giddha is a very vigorous folk dance and like other such dances it is very much an affair of the legs. So quick is the movement of the feet in its faster parts that it is difficult for the spectator even to wink till the tempo falls again. The embroidered 'duppattas' and heavy jewelry of the participants whose number is unrestricted further exaggerate the movements.

During the dance 'giddha' songs called 'bolis' are also sung. One participant generally sings the 'bolis' and when the last but one line is reached, the tempo of the song rises and all start dancing. In this manner 'bolis' alternate with the dance sequence which continue for a considerable period of time.

Mimicry is aso very popular in 'Giddha'. One girl may play the aged bridegroom and another his young bride; or one may play a quarellsome sister in law and another a humble bride. In this way Giddha provides for all the best forum for giving vent to one's emotions.

The traditional dress during giddha dance is short female style shirt (choli) with ghagra or lehnga (loose shirt upto ankle-length) or ordinary Punjabi Salwar-Kamiz, rich in colour, cloth and design. The ornaments that they wear are suggi-phul (worn on head) to pazaibs (anklets), haar-hamela, (gem-studded golden necklace) baazu-band (worn around upper-arm) and raani-haar (a long necklace made of solid gold).


TEEYAN



Giddha can be seen at its best when 'Teeyan' or the women's dance festival is celebrated. This festival in Punjab is celebrated in the month of Sawan. The dance usually takes place on the bank of some river or pond under big shady trees. Swings are thrown over the branches and singing, swinging and dancing starts. On this day when the married daughters come to their parent's house their brothers fix the swings for them. As they swing they share their anxieties with each other through songs. Dressed in their best and decked by ornaments, girls gather during these festivals like the fairies. These dancers look a medley of color and beauty. The festival continues till the 3rd Lunar day in the month to full moon and there is a gala function on the concluding day.

KIKLI

Kilkli, is more of a sport than a dance, is generally popular with the young girls. The dance performed in pairs, is a favourite of the young girls. It can be done by any even number of performers starting with two. Before beginning the dance, the two participants stand face to face with their feet close to each other’s and their bodies inclined back. Standing in this pose the arms of the dancers are stretched to the maximum limitand their hands are interlocked firmly.


The dance is performed when the pairs, maintaining this pose, wheel round and round in a fast movement at the same spot with the feet serving as the pivotal points. The girls sing as they swirl around with colorful ‘orhnis’ or ‘daupttas’ flowing from their heads and anklets producing tinkling melodies.


There is a rich repertoire of traditional songs available that are used to accompany the ‘kikli’ dance. Most of these songs consist merely of loosely rhyming lines without underlying theme. One of the examples is :
Kikli kleer di, Pag mere vir di, Dupatta mere bhai da, Phitte mun jawai da..



Haanji karo read te seekho sade punjabi folk dances bare  :balle:

13
Jokes Majaak / WORLD'S BEST JOKES
« on: May 15, 2012, 09:41:54 AM »
The University of Hertfordshire concluded a research project to find the best jokes in the world. 
Here they are :


Best Joke in the world:
A couple of New Jersey hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?”
The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: “Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead.” There is a silence, then a shot is heard.
The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: “OK, now what?“



Second Place:   
Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson go on a camping trip.  After a good dinner and a bottle of wine, they retire for the night, and go to sleep.
Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend. “Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”
“I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes” replies Watson.
“And what do you deduce from that?”

Watson ponders for a minute.  “Well,    
Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.
Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo.
Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three.
Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.
Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful, and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe.
But what does it tell you, Holmes?”

Holmes is silent for a moment. 
“Watson, you idiot!” he says.  “Someone has stolen our tent!”



Top joke in USA:
A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer.

His friend says: “Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man.”

The man then replies: “Yeah, well we were married 35 years.” 



Top joke in Canada:   
When NASA first started sending up astronauts, they quickly discovered that ballpoint pens would not work in zero gravity. To combat the problem, NASA scientists spent a decade and $12 billion to develop a pen that writes in zero gravity, upside down, underwater, on almost any surface including glass and at temperatures ranging from below freezing to 300°C.

The Russians used a pencil.



Top joke in Australia:   
This woman rushed to see her doctor, looking very much worried and all strung out. She rattles off: “Doctor, take a look at me. When I woke up this morning, I looked at myself in the mirror and saw my hair all wiry and frazzled up, my skin was all wrinkled and pasty, my eyes were bloodshot and bugging out, and I had this corpse-like look on my face! What's WRONG with me, Doctor!?”

The doctor looks her over for a couple of minutes, then calmly says: “Well, I can tell you that there ain't nothing wrong with your eyesight....” 




Top joke in Belgium:   
Why do ducks have webbed feet?
To stamp out fires.

Why do elephants have flat feet?
To stamp out burning ducks



Top joke in Germany:   
A general noticed one of his soldiers behaving oddly. The soldier would pick up any piece of paper he found, frown and say: “That's not it” and put it down again. This went on for some time, until the general arranged to have the soldier psychologically tested. The psychologist concluded that the soldier was deranged, and wrote out his discharge from the army.

The soldier picked it up, smiled and said: “That's it.”



Top joke in UK:
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!” The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!”

The man says: “You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you.” 




Top Joke in England:   
Two guys are sitting on a bar stool. One starts to insult the other one. He screams, “I slept with your mother!” The bar gets quiet as everyone listens to see what the other weasel will do. The first again yells, “I SLEPT WITH YOUR MOTHER!”

The other says, “Go home dad you’re drunk.” 




Top Joke in Wales:   
A turtle was walking down an alley in New York when he was mugged by a gang of snails. A police detective came to investigate and asked the turtle if he could explain what happened.

The turtle looked at the detective with a confused look on his face and replied “I don't know, it all happened so fast.”




Top Joke in Northern Ireland:   
A doctor says to his patient, “I have bad news and worse news”.

“Oh dear, what's the bad news?” asks the patient.

The doctor replies, “You only have 24 hours to live.”

“That's terrible”, said the patient. “How can the news possibly be worse?”

The doctor replies, “I've been trying to contact you since yesterday.” 


Top Joke in Scotland:
I want to die peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather.
Not screaming in terror like his passengers. 




14
Gup Shup / Msg_Are you a Working Woman or a House-Wife
« on: May 14, 2012, 05:15:18 AM »
A Heart-touching Message by a Woman

Someone asked Me "Are you a Working Woman or a House-Wife" ?

I said : Yes I'm a full time working House-Wife.

I work 24 hours a day

I'm a "Mom", a "Wife", "Daughter", and a "Daughter-in-Law"

I'm an Alarm Clock, a Cook, a Maid, a Teacher, a Waiter, a Nanny, a Nurse, a Handyman, a Security Officer, a Counselor and a Comforter.

I don't get Holidays, sick, leave or days off

I work through Day and Night

I'm on call all hours and get paid with a sentence -> "What You Do All Day at Home"  :sad:


15
Discussions / For or against abortion?
« on: May 11, 2012, 03:47:26 PM »
Are you Against Abortion (pro-life) or For Abortion (pro choice)

Whats your stand on this? and why?  :wait:

16
Help & Suggestions / Availability status
« on: May 07, 2012, 12:56:14 PM »
Availability status

Hey friends,

Main sochdi ci, kyu na Pj te vi away or idle wala option hove? (Dot jo yellow show kare)

Because sometimes apaan away or chatroom ch hunde aa and ppl assume, ki tusi juwaab dehn ch interested nahi etc etc

so vadya na rahu je apan like 20-25 min active na rahe hoye ta apne aap status idle te chal jawe  :wait:
nahi ta members *PJ FB* bharr dinde ne hakaa mar-mar ke  :loll:

Tuhade sarea de ki vichaar ne ehs bare??  :dnk:
baki admin n subadmins v plzz dass dehn ki eh mumkin hega ya nahi? :)


17
Pics / Miss PJ 2012
« on: May 06, 2012, 02:24:09 PM »
Miss PJ   :loll: :loll: (no offense guys!)
kini sohni aa  :he:




18
Gup Shup / boys de naam sandesh
« on: May 05, 2012, 02:02:39 PM »

" Patola , purja , cheeji etc " words use karan wale boys de naam sandesh

Kindly ghar ja ke Apne Mom, Sister and Daughter nu eda greet karo
" Purjeya ki banaya ? "
" Patoleya kithe chla ? "
" Kiwe cheeji ki kardi c ? "

fer soch k dekho tusi ki apnea nu eda bolan te .. tuhanu kidda da mehsoos hunda ae .. ??


I know  eh msg keya nu pasand nahi auhna, bcz jad apne ghar de ijjat di gal hove - fer bura lagda na?
baki kuriya vi ta kise di bhen ya mapean de jiggar da tukda hundiya.. ki auhna di ijjat nahi? only bcz auh tuhadia ni kuj lagdiya??

kyunki kuriya nal inj misbehave kita jhnda aa, key mapae kuriya nu janam dehn toh vi darde ne..
so beanti hai tuhade sarea aggeh, ki ehs paap ch tusi apna jogdaan na pao
Kuriya nu khuk ch maran da ek hor reason na bano, aggeh bathere reasons (daaj etc) hege ne

So frds pleasee respect girls!!

19
PJ Games / ART THREAD - POST YOUR ART
« on: May 04, 2012, 01:44:23 PM »

ART THREAD - POST YOUR ART


Hey friends,
m starting a new Art thread - let's see sade pj-members ch kina talent aa  8-> (just for fun!!)

post ur OWN drawings, paintings or sketches..! and plz keep it clean!!

Uda kise ne koi pic nahi pauni ..so lemme start with my 'tukmaar'  :loll:




Chalo dikhao apni-apni minakarii/karagirii  8->




20
Shayari / The Roses of Life
« on: May 04, 2012, 04:33:25 AM »


  8->


I've dreamed many dreams that never came true,
I've seen them vanish at dawn.
But I've realized enough of my dreams, thank God,
To make me want to dream on.

I've prayed many prayers, when no answers came,
Though I waited so patient and long,
But answers came to enough of my prayers
To make me keep praying on.

I've trusted many a friend who failed
And left me to weep alone,
But I've found enough of my friends to be true
To make me keep trusting on.
I've sown many seeds that fell by the way
For the birds to feed upon,
But I've held enough golden sheaves in my hands
To make me keep sowing on.

I've drained the cup of disappointment and pain
And gone many days without song,
But I've sipped enough nectar from the roses of life
To make me want to live on..!!  :okk:


Author Unknown

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