Little Johnny came into the kitchen where his mother was making
dinner.

His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to
tell his mother what he wanted."Mom, I want a bike for my birthday."

Little Johny was a bit of a troublemaker. He had gotten into trouble at school and at home.

Johny's mother asked him if he thought he deserved to get a bike for
his birthday. Little Johnny, of course, thought he did.

Johnny's mother, being a Christian woman, wanted him to reflect on his behavior over the last year and write a letter to God and tell him why he deserved a bike for his birthday.

Little Johnny stomped up the steps to his room and sat down to write
God a letter.

LETTER 1:
Dear God, I have been a very good boy this year and I would like a bike for my birthday. I want a red one.
Your friend,
Johnny

Johnny knew this wasn't true. He had not been a very good boy this
year, so he tore up the letter and started over.

LETTER 2:
Dear God, This is your friend Johnny. I have been a pretty good boy this year and I would like a red bike for my birthday.
Thank you,
Johnny

Johnny knew this wasn't true either. He tore up the letter and started again.

LETTER 3:
Dear God, I have been an OK boy this year and I would really like a red bike for my birthday.
Johnny

Johnny knew he could not send this letter to God either. Johnny
was very upset. He went downstairs and told his mother he wanted to go church.

"Just be home in time for dinner", his mother said.

Johnny walked down the street to the church and up to the altar. He looked around to see if anyone was there.

He picked up a statue of the Virgin Mary and slipped it under his shirt and ran out of the church, down the street, into his house, and up to his room.

He shut the door to his room and sat down with a piece of paper and
a pen. Johnny began to write his letter to God.

LETTER 4:
I'VE GOT YOUR MOM. IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN, SEND THE BIKE.
Signed
YOU KNOW WHO