Hard of hearing...
A man goes to the doctor and complains that his wife can`t hear him.
"How bad is it?" the doctor asks.
"I have no idea", says the husband.
"Well, please test her. Stand 20 feet away from her and say something. If she doesn`t hear you, get closer and say the same thing. Keep moving closer repeating the comment until she does hear you. That way we`ll have an idea of her range of hearing loss."
So the man goes home and sees his wife in the kitchen chopping up vegetables for dinner.
From 20 feet: "What are we having for dinner?"
No answer. From 10 feet, same thing. From 5 feet, same thing. Finally he`s standing right behind her ...
"What`s for dinner?"
She turns around, looks at him and says "For the FOURTH time ... BEEF STEW!"