Speed Kills - Slow Infuriates!

I'd give you the finger but it's in my nose.

If you don't like my driving - STAY OFF THE SIDEWALK!

!Scixelsyd Etinu. [Read Backwards]

Improve your image - be seen with me!

I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.

Driver carries no cash--he's married!

I don't have a license to kill. I have a learner's permit.

To all you virgins, thanks for nothing.

Seen on the back of a biker's vest: If you can read this, my wife fell off.

You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.

Consciousness - that annoying time between naps.

Elvis is dead, and I'm not feeling too good myself.

If we aren't supposed to eat animals why are they made of meat?

I love animals - they're delicious.

When you do a good deed get a receipt just in case heaven is like the IRS.

God must love stupid people - he made so many.

I want to die in my sleep like my grandfather - Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.