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Author Topic: Appropriate Definitions  (Read 1295 times)

Offline SonnenKinder

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Appropriate Definitions
« on: December 10, 2009, 05:21:00 PM »
School: A place where Papa pays and Son plays.
 

Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.


Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.


Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.


Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower..
 

Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through 'the minds of either'
 

Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.


Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.


Dictionary: A place where success comes before work.


Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.
 

Father: A banker provided by nature..
 

Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
 

Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.


Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.

Classic: Books, which people praise, but do not read..


Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
 

Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
 

Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.


Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions..


Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be wise after death
 
 

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