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Author Topic: Winner (correction) : PJ Best Story telling competition 2014  (Read 16231 times)

Offline rabbdabanda

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                                                                                     sat shri akal to all ji
                       pehla te sabnu bht bht mubarka jaina participate kita
      jis ghadi da tuhanu bht besabri nal intjar c oh ghadi a gayi hai aayo ji aj da din ralke manode aa punjabi janta de       de naam
                                                            tuhade intjar diyan ghdiyan khtam karde hoye announce karde a k

                                                                                                                                           
 

                                         


Judge 1


contestant  1
Storyline
Story da suruwat bhat vadiya c.. eh ik nani pari di story a .. j k es duniyan te aoun layi khush c .. bt usnu es duniyan te aoun nai dita geya .. msg vadiya aa k save da girls ..oh v eh duniyan dekhna chonindi .. end was good = 4
Performance
The way she  present the story was really  good awaz bhat sohni a .. bolan da andaaz bhat vadiya  c.. mainu kite voice drop hundi nai laggi .. creativity was ok .. all the time she was in her character… end was really good =6 
Total =10


Contestant  2
storyline
Story da start v baht vadiya treeke nal suru kita geya .. ik lele di kahni jisne kini hushyri nal na museebat da samna kita .. Hanji sahi keha k sanu greedy nai hona chida Sanu help karni chidi museebat vele  That is really interesting  story .. End vi sohna c =4     
Performance
The way he persent the story was really good .Awaz was brealaint .bolan da andaaz bhat sohna c ,full of confidance .koi dar nai che  was enjoying  the  story, expression is good .Creativity is good  ,”jehda vich bache ne participate kita  that was really nice ,that was plus point for that .”  thoda jeha vich jahe mainu lagga k jiwe lost jahe hunde aa over all it was really good =  5.5
Total = 9.5



Contestant  3
storyline
Story da start sohna detailed c . fer vich jahe ja k up down jeha hon lag geya. Eh ik old fashioned story a ik raje te osde bête di ,kiwe osdi maout hundi aa te kise de kite di saje kise hor nu mil jandi .Sanu apne karma di saja bhugtni paindi aa waheguru te wishwas rakhna chida bht sohni sikheya aa esde vich aa. bht hi sohne treeke nal ehna ne end kita story da = 3.5
Performance
The way of  persent the story was  gud .Awaz was so nice n sweet , start vich awaz ok c fr laga jewe dari jah n kambdi jahi. kite kite  awaz  drop ho rahi c , like  jiwe lost jehe hude hon .Confidence di kami  lagi mainu ,start vich ok c, fr thoda lost jeha ho geya ,fr baad ch ok ,kind a up  n down . expression theek theek c  .over all it was gud .Creativity was gud , ehna ne bht hi chnge treeke nal sab suneya . kind a simple   =5
Total = 8.5


Contestant  4
storyline
Story di suruwat eni detailed nai c , was really simple .Eh ik  emotional story c .kade kade eho jahe hadse hunde aa jisde nal kise di sari jindgi hi badal jandi aa. I think esde vich j dhyaan nal dekheya jawe te eh sikheya mildi a k sanu kade v nashe te vich drive nai karni chidi ,os ik galti karn ik bache ne apni ma te bhen nu hameshsa layi kho leya .again end was really simply = 3
Performance
The way of he present the story  was gud .Awaz was brilliant koi dar nai c show Honda. Expression was gud story de hisaab nal change hunde c .confidance v poora c . mainu kite v esdi  voice drop hundi nai lagi . n kite v mainu character toi bahr nai laga, it was gud = 6
Total = 9

                                                             
Contestant 5
storyline
Story di surwat  bht sohni n detailed c .. story emotional c jo k ehna di aapbeeti  c .bht hi dukh vali gal a sunke dil kambh janda .moral eh a k jo aj hai ohi hai.kal kise ne nai dekheya so love your parents end was really gud =4
Performance
the way she present was really nice .voice is really gud ,boln da andaaz v sohna c , confidence v poora .. expression was ok  .. apne character toi baher nai c = 6
Total =10


                                                       


Janta 's Choice


VoterVoted forPostsStatus
azs10107Contestant 12440Y
munna bhaiContestant 116163Y
Ankhi__PunjabanContestant 17594Y
Sweet_Desi_kuriContestant 13605Y
Sareef JATTContestant 11827Y
apurvContestant 13076Y
harmeets1991Contestant 12038Y
kala naagContestant 1130Y
ManmeeetContestant 1731Y
d3si_j4ttContestant 14N
RooHContestant 2770Y
adminContestant 37846Y
sandhuonlineContestant 33165Y
Dhillon and AujlaContestant 31015Y
kamal.preetContestant 36698Y
Jatt.Contestant 43406Y
The desi dudeContestant 44142Y
jaspreetmandContestant 46616Y
♥♥ ਗਭਰੂ ਚੋਟੀ ਦਾ ♥♥Contestant 4690Y
Lucha_IndienContestant 55132Y
the goruContestant 55013Y
ashfaq_gujrContestant 56872Y
s_deepContestant 5330Y
sanjana gillContestant 54900Y
marjana_komalContestant 5195Y
Raj AulakhContestant 51912Y
Mani KaurContestant 53156Y
NIMANI KAMALContestant 51808Y
Sau JattContestant 5245Y
Mor di MorniContestant 51485Y
S.S.P GabruContestant 5573Y
behl.himContestant 5907Y
StylO_HeeRContestant 50N
chocolate_heerContestant 537N
Top UserVotes100+ Voters
Contestant 19azs10107, munna bhai, Ankhi__Punjaban, Sweet_Desi_kuri, Sareef JATT, apurv, harmeets1991, kala naag, Manmeeet
Contestant 21RooH
Contestant 34admin, sandhuonline, Dhillon and Aujla, kamal.preet
Contestant 44Jatt., The desi dude, jaspreetmand, ♥♥ ਗਭਰੂ ਚੋਟੀ ਦਾ ♥♥
Contestant 513Lucha_Indien, the goru, ashfaq_gujr, s_deep, sanjana gill, marjana_komal, Raj Aulakh, Mani Kaur, NIMANI KAMAL, Sau Jatt, Mor di Morni, S.S.P Gabru, behl.him

Janta's Choice


contestant 1: 9 votes
Percentage out of 60% :   9/31 = 17.4%
contestant 2 :1 vote
Percentage out of 60% :  1.95%
contestant 3 : 4 votes
Percentage out of 60% : 7.75%
contestant 4 : 4 votes
Percentage out of 60% :7.75%
contestant 5 :13votes 
Percentage out of 60% : 25%




Judge 2

1. contestant
storyline te 4 vichon 4 points
story short ci, par apne wal khish ke rakheya kahani ne..bilkul vi interest level nhi tuteya!
kahani boht vadya seekheya dindi aa, ki dheeya nu putta warga pyar dao and aggeh vadhan da haunsla dain .. ta ki auh vi padh-likh, mehnat kr ke - ucche rutbe hasil kar sakhan.

performance te 6 vichon 5
kahani sunon lge awaaz ch kafi tehrav ci .. different roles lai awaaz da sahi vartu kita geya ae ..
awaaz kafi clear ci .. maybe BG music nal thoda enhance kr sakhde ci apni story nu.

_________________________________________________________________________
2. contestant

storyline 4 vichon 4:
story simple aa, isley har ummar de listeners (vaddean toh chote) lai samjhan nu saukhi ci.
story sunondea, key words de arth vi dite gaye san, jo ki story samjhan lai help kar dinde ne.
story nu jada lamba nhi khishyea geya .. length bilkul sahi ci, jis karan listener da interest level bilkul nhi ghatteya.
another point, jis kar ke interest kahani vicho nhi ghatteya was ki listener nal taal-mel bana ke rakheya geya (introduction and end ch)
Kahani de sare matlab (morals) vadya ci.. especially ki kahani suna ke aap sare morals changi tara explain kite gaye (again har ummar de shorte lai samjhan nu saukha ci)


performance 6 vichon 6:
Awaaz ne shrotea nu story nal ban ke rakheya,
Contestant ne kafi vishvastpadak dhang nal jazzbatan nu listener tak pounchaya (awaaz ch khushi bayaan hundi ci - jo ki story de mutabik bilkul sahi aa).



__________________________________________________________________________
3. contestant
summary:

storyline: 4 vichon 3
story kafi aachi aa, jo ki bohat vaadya message dindi insaan de karma de lekh-jhok bare.
par sunon lageya uhsnu kafi lambha khishea gea, jisnal listener da interest-level ghat sakhda te story de end ch vadya message miss ho sakhda.



performance: 6 vichon 4
awaaz sohni aa - par je story sunon lageya thora hor effort paunde, it could have been even better.
(like in 8:33 te contestant nu story sunondea aap saah charh geya, so maybe sunon toh pehla auh thoda soch-vichar kar sakhde ci, ki kithe pause laina and kehde words te vajan daina)


_______________________________________________________________________________
4. contestant
summary:


storyline: 4 vicho 3.5

story kafi aachi aa, jo ki ek bohat aacha message dindi aa, ki jo pal hega - uhsnu jee-jaan nal jeeyo .. agle pal da kise nu nahi pata so jo pal hega, uhsda shukrana mana ke chalo.
story thodi choti rakh ke sunonde ta shayad jaada dehr tak shrotea da interest level bann ke rehnda..
Eh kahani baki stories (5th wali nu chad ke) kafi alag aa.


performance:6 vichon 5.
 contestant di awaaz achi ae, jisda vartu v bohat vadya kita geya aa
[different roles(kale kapdea wala admi, bacha & saleswoman] lai awaaz de alag tehraav]
contestant ne BG ch music da sahara lai ke, kahani nu alag tareeke nal pesh kita (background music di volume thodi hor ghat hundi ta shayad kahani hor vi vadya lagdi sunon nu)




______________________________________________________________________________
5. contestant

Storyline: 4 vichon 2
Contestant ne apni hadh-beeti sunai, jo ki kise lai vi judge karna mushkil ae,
par je judging criteria dekhiye ta ehna da moral ta bohat aacha aa,
ki apne parents da satikar karo and auhna nu proud feel karao, par with all due respect - message story de nal changi tara judd nahi paya.



Performance: 6 wichon 4
i liked the intro, bas hadd-beeti sunan lageya .. you could leave out sentences like 'so emotional hon lai ready ho jao'.
Story di shurvat te ant song nal kiti gaye, jo ki listener ute kafi prabhavashali rehnda,
baki background music da sahara lai ke, kahani nu vadya tareeke nal listener tak pounchaya contestant ne.


                                                             

Judge 3

Pehla te ji sarya da dhanwaad jinha ne hissa liya is comp ch. Sarya ne boht vadia khania sunayia , kuj sikhan nu milya. Sarya nu mubarka. Sadi majboori thode effort nu judge karna pai riha mafi chahage ji . :rabb:

Contestant 1:

Inha ne boht sohni khani sunayi. Ajj de boht hi gambheer dukhant nu darsaundi mann nu tumban vali. Marde jande insani jazbataa nu haloondi es khani nu vadia dhang naal nibhaya.  Par thode thehrao di kami laggi es vich. Baki sab vadia tareeke naal nibhaya.
Storyline vaste ehna nu 4 no.
Performance layi 4 no

Contestant 2:

Ehna ne bachya de layi khani sunayi.  Khania bachya nu sab to vadh bhaundia ne te eh es kamm ch mahir lagde ne k bachya nu kive khush rakhya janda. Apne effort ch
Poori tra khare uttre ne. Par vich ik do jgah ehna nu v track te aun nu thoda zor launa pya lagda bhull gaye c. Ik slah e ji khanikar nu eh dhyaan zroor rakhna chahida k ohna de readers or listeners kaun ne.
Story line layi 2.5
Performance layi poore 6 no.


Contestant 3:

Hanji ehna di khani mai personally kafi enjoy kitti. Eh khani mai aap suni hoyi aa meri daddi kolo. Bt she was better :pagel:
Tuc v vadia sikhya den vali story sunayi. Bt ik laiy di kami jihi c. Khani ruk ruk k agge vadh rahi c. Kafi confuse jihe hoye paye c tuc. Bt natural way naal sunayi story.

Storyline layi 2 no.
Performance layi : 5 no.



Contestant 4:

Inha ne vadia khani chuni maasoomiyat bhari. Kise da v dil ro pawe ik masoom de aise jazbaat sun k. Khani sunayi v vadia dhang naal. Ik laiy vich. Gambheer awaz vadia andaaz.

Storyline layi 4 no.
Performance layi 5 no.

Contestant 5:

Inha ne jo hadbiti sunayi e. Sab to zyada parbhawit karan vali c. Shayd es layi k oh effortless c. Apne dil de jazbaat bakhoobi pesh kite. Jive kise sahmne baithe naal galla kar rahe hon.
Par mai muafi manda k tuhanu mai es judgment cho bahr rakh riha. Mere apne vichar mutabik khanikar nu har tra de te har kise de jazbaat mehsoos karne te byan karne aune chahide. Par tuc apni hi khani suna k apne aap nu limited jiha kar lya. Beshak tuhada effort sab to vadia. Es layi mai muafi chahuga.
Tuhanu mai koi number ni de sakda , kise de jazbata nu koi kiwe numbera ch tol sakda. Sry ji


                                                               


Judge 4

Contestant 1 - Nanni Pari
Story = 3
Length poori a
Nice story…bahut meaningful....ik social problem naal related....par linear te coherent nahi….Kade narrator intervene karda characters di gall introduce karn lei kade nahi…..
bahut vadiya sikheya dindi a.

Performance : 3
It’s nice that contestant tried to give the character different voice…par couldn’t maintain it coherently till the end....Rabb ji te narrator di avaj mil jandi.....better ho sakdi si inserting also more pauses...Starting sohni hoi si...Par end tak maintain nahi hoi

Total = 6

Contestant 2 - Lella
Story = 4 
Length fine a (more than 3 min)
Nice and funny story, very linear and cohesive...Narrator da bahut work disea is story ch...
Ik hi story cho 3 morals kad dite, Wah !

Performance= 6
"lelle " da meaning dassan to shuru kar ke end tak bahut vadiya tarah....easily sunai  jida bacheya nu sunai jandi....Is contestant nu music di lor ni pei creativity dikhoun lei…awaaj naal hi kmaal kar dita......so alag tarike naal creativity dikhai....ik normal story nu Awaj de andaaz nal funny jehi bna dita and apne comments add karke narrator ne story nu hor vadiya kar dita....Ena de sunaun de andaaz to lagda ke eh competion di spirit nu samj geye

Total = 10

Contestant 3 - Raja
Story= 3
Length sehi a 
Story sohni a... Bahut sare listeners nu ona da bachpan yaad aa geya huna par…..coherency and cohesion hai nahi….story jada details and explanations ch kho jandi....
Eh story vi bahut  vadiya sikheya dindi , Sab karma da khed.....jo bijeya ohi vadna

Performance: 2
Nice start. Par Stability ni hegi....story sunandi sunadi contestant vi guaach jandi….apne sentences ch thori confuse ho jandi.....she should have used more pauses, dividing it in parts....creativity vi  nahi dikhai....

Total = 5

Contestant 4 - Christmas day
Story=  length is fine
Story bahut sohni a…Linear,coherent, cohesive…It’s short but it has its start and a coherent ending.
Moral contestant ne explicitly nahi dassea….par story adult audience lei so last words are enough to get the meaning of the story. Kei war insaan kush eda da experience karda …jo ke as a singles episode shayed kush vi na lagge par poori life badal jandi.

Performance = 6
Sab Ton best performance is contestant di a….Story da har ik scene bahut sohna describe kita..... Narrator often intervenes to describe the characters emotions….narrator nu alag te each character nu alag avaj diti... te eh end tak fully maintain vi kita…..should be appreciated also the use of pauses…..
Background ch music di use ch vi creativity….music situations naal change hunda….starting ch chritsmas vala, fer sad ho janda…..overall very nicely performed

Total = 10

Contestant 5-Personal experience

Story =  3.5
Length sehi a
Personal experience sunaya es contestant ne…very sad story...Rabb di raza hundi….Us de Hukam ch sab kush hunda….es lei os nu comment nahi kar sakde
Story ch coherency poori maintain nahi rehi till end…specially last ch last ch aa ke bikhar jandi
story da moral nahi dasde contestant but ik message dinde listeners nu ...jo ke bahut vadiya a

Performance =  6
Nice use of music….Song nal story introduce kiti….background ch music chalda reha….last te rok dita to have the attention on the words…to be noticed also the change of tone…that comes actually naturally because it’s a personal experience

Total = 9.5
[/size]



                                                                                                     

Critics Choice


Judge 1

Total Marks : 10

contestant 1 :10
Percentage out of 40% : 10/10 x  = 40%
contestant 2 :9.5
Percentage out of 40% : 38%
contestant 3 :8.5
Percentage out of 40% : 34%
contestant 4: 9
Percentage out of 40% : 36%
contestant 5:10
Percentage out of 40% : 40%
Judge 2

contestant 1:9
Percentage out of 40% : 36%
contestant 2:10
Percentage out of 40% : 40%
contestant 3:7
Percentage out of 40% : 28%
contestant 4:8.5
Percentage out of 40% : 34%
contestant 5:6
Percentage out of 40% : 24%
Judge 3


contestant 1:8
Percentage out of 40% : 32%
contestant 2:8.5
Percentage out of 40% : 34%
contestant 3:7
Percentage out of 40% : 28%
contestant 4:9
Percentage out of 40% : 36%
contestant 5:0
Percentage out of 40% : 0%
Judge 4

contestant 1:6
Percentage out of 40% : 24%
contestant 2:10
Percentage out of 40% : 40%
contestant 3:5
Percentage out of 40% : 20%
contestant 4:10
Percentage out of 40% : 40%
contestant 5:9.5
Percentage out of 40% : 38%

Average of all the judges

contestant 1:33%

contestant 2::38%

contestant 3:27.5%

contestant 4:36.5%

contestant 5:25.5%

Total points

Contestant 1 : 17.4%+33%=50.40%

Contestant 2 :1.95+38%= 39.95%

Contestant 3: 7.75%+27.5%=35.25%

Contestant 4: 7.75%+36.5%=44.25%

Contestant 5: 25.5+25%= 50.50%


and the winner is (contestant no. 5) Mani Kaur



                                                                             

PS: Special thanks to all the judges & Mr. Chhalla(takneeqi uljhana nal aap ne jaanu karwaya) , deepsandhu (for her hard work) for making this huge!



Contestant no. 1 = Sehaj Randhawa
Contestant no. 2 = Grenade Singh
Contestant no. 3 = taur kaur
Contestant no. 4 = Sareef_jatt
contestant no. 5 = Mani Kaur





Je kise ne math dekhna howe tan spreadsheet sshot dekh sakde and mein file wi send kar sakda.

Maafi zaroor mangde a, sareef jatt bai ton, galti naal winner saabit karta. As consolation, Sareef_jatt nu 1 mahina mod banan da offer ditta janda hai. Kise wi staff member or menu msg kar sakde.
« Last Edit: June 24, 2014, 12:09:45 AM by Jattnetics »

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