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Author Topic: Winner : Shayiri PJ layi April/May 2014  (Read 8745 times)

Offline rabbdabanda

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Winner : Shayiri PJ layi April/May 2014
« on: May 11, 2014, 08:31:29 AM »
Sat Shri Akal! Pj Nivaasio! Ajj Apa hun final Winner Result declare karn jaa rhe aa apne PJ Shayri Competition layi. so, dheyaan nal zarra apne pen pencila kadd lo, hisaab-kitaab bathera krna paina :D: :D:
Sarean ne bahut sohna likheya!! watt kadd te main keha haneria leyaatia :rockon:
chakkte fatte... :excited:




Judge 1


Laraki jatti::
Laraki jatti ji ne pj lai vadia te detail ch dassya va so poore 3 no.
Inni lambi kawita ch Content v kafi hadd takk poora kita gya va har jazbaat likhya va par kite kite lafza da her fer aa laey to bhatakdi kite kite so 3 no.
Aad madh ant Bare gall kariye ta ohde ne 2.5 no.
Total : 8.5


Pangebaaz mutyar :
Pangebaaz ji ne v vadia likhya va. Lambayi lai poore 3no.
Te pj de sare pangya bare detail ch dassya v vadia content aa par kite kite peshkari vich ooch neech va pehre bnaun lagge vazan da khyaal
Ni rakhya va. So ehde layi 3 no.
Aad madh ant bare gall kariye ta poori gall nu vadia dhang naal darsya va ehde layi poore 3 no.
total : 9


Garry sandhu ::
Sandhu ji ne es likhat vich v kmaal kitti va. Lambai lai poore3 no.
Content te peshkari v kmaal e ohde layi poore 4 no.
Aad madh ant vich pj da asli roop pesh karan ch poore safal hoye va so ohde layi v poore 3 no.
total : 10


Desi desi::
Dhillon ji ne pj bare vadia likhya par fer ohna nu lambayi maar gayi. So sirf 1 no.
Content vich pj di gall ghat te apne jazbaat zyada share kite va so ehde layi 1.5 no.
Aad madh ant bare kuj v kehna mushkil hai so 1 no.
total : 3.5


Kinnu::
Kinnu ji ne eh kavita v vadia likhi va. Lambayi layi 2.5 no
Content di gall kariye ta oh v kafi mazedaar aa te pj ta boht vadia naughty pakh sahmne rakhda va te peshkari v vadia va so 3.5 no.
Aad madh ant v vadia ik gall layi te usda visthar kita te baad ch krara jya ant es gall layi poore 3no.
Total : 9









Judge 2



sat shri akal ji
HAnji sab ne vadiya likhiya .
.


larakhi jatti
 - larakhi jatti ji tusi vadiya likhia ji..thode kol material vadiya se par tusi peresent vadiya nahi kita ji..suru tho ley k end tak kujh pta nahi lagda ji
tappe bna k likhna chaida se thonu ji..odda pj barre bahut theek lagia
keep it up ..
point sytem --
based on length-- 2
lenght de hisab nal thoda way of written is very impressive ..
lines de ta watt kaddte
based on material --3.5
jidan mai upper likhia thode kol material bahut vadiya se ji
tusi hareek barre likhia pj de user lyi .. eh koi koi he kar sakda
thodi kalam da jwab nahi ..
based on starting nd ending -- 1.1
thode topic ch sab gallan theek se ji
bas tusi starting nd ending karn ch galati kar gaye
thoda way of presnt is not gud .this is really disconforting
tappe bna k likhna c .. kitho suru kita kithe katam kita kujh nahi pta lag reha ji
total marks - 6.5

pangebazz mutiyar
-- hanji tusi bahut vadiya likhia .. thoda way of writing is great !! tusi nikkia nikkia gallan include kitia .. dil bar bar read karn nu kari janda ji ..
edda he likhde raho ji .. keep it up

point sytsem
based on length- 2.6
hanji mutiyar ji tusi topic di length sahi rakhi ..
suru tho ley k same length nal likhia ...
based on material - 3
hanji mutiyar ji tusi pj barre hor v likh sakde se enna sohne topic se ji thode kol
par jinna material se thode kol sahi se ..
based on starting nd ending- 2
Tusi mutiyar ji suru te end theek kita .. overall v theek se thoda sab
total marks-7.6


sandhu fardikotia
 - hanji tusi vadda sohna likhiya ji pj layi apne diffenrt view dite ji..thora hor lamba likhn di try karni se ji . bakki keep it up buddy
point system
based on length- 2.4
 hanji length de hisab nal thoda likhia hoyea vadiya ji .. bs tusi ji shyari same length ch nae kiti
kujh lines lambhia kartia kujh shootia
ji.. waise likhia ji sohna tusi ji
based on material - 3
hanji sandhu ji tusi material nu sahi way ch likhia ji . thodi shyari de kya kehne ji .. tusi ek differnt trah likhia ji
based on starting nd ending - 2
hanji thodi starting nd ending vaddi vadiya se .. dil karda se bar bar read kari javo ji ...
total marks -7.4


desi desi
 - hanji ji tusi vadda sohna likhia ji ..thori jahi length vaddi likhni se ji
bakki  tusi participate ta kita ji its nice
point system
based on length - 1.1
hanji tusi length vaddi gatt rakhi se topic di ji.. thoda jeha hor likh dinde ta award ley he jande ..lol
based on material- 1.6
hanji s ji kya kehne .. material jinna v kol se sahi way nal persent kita ji
based on starting nd ending - 1.5
hanji suru vadiya kita se tusi ji
par the end sahi nahi kita ji
total marks -4.2


ni yaar tera malang jeha aka kinnu
- hanji your shyari about punjabi janta is nice .. tusi apne topic ch jinna likhia vadiya likhia keep it up
point system
based on length - 1.5
hanji length de hisab nal thoda topic bahut chootha se ... tusi jadda tho jadda likhn di koshish karni c .. aghe tho kiyal rakhna ji
based on material - 1.5
hanji materail jinna haiga se ohnu hor increase karn di koshish karni chaidi se thonu ji ...bakki jinna likhia sohna likhia
based on starting nd end - 1
ek pharagraph ch se sarra kujh likha .. tappe bna k likhna de your way of presntation is not so gud ...
total marks -4







Judge 3

 

Laraki Jatti
Length = 3
Structure = 3
Very narrative structure.  Introduction ch dass dita kis matter te gall karni te audience nu sunan di appeal vi kiti. Jo matter Introduction ch dassea onu completely develop kita in next verses by telling the whole journy on pj from very first days to the current situation. Conclusion reflect karda introduction nu: she addresses to the audience as in the introduction.
Content =  4
Pj nu fully dedicated poem a. Directly apna experience dassde hoe, indirectly pj da sohna jeha mahol vi describe kar dita. 
Total=10


Pangebaaz Mutteyar
Length = 3
Structure = 3
Eh vi vadiya structure a. It starts lightly and than becomes more and more intense, giving in each strophe more details about the life on pj.
Content = 3.8
Nice poem a, bilkul vi off topic nahi jandi . Pj da mahol sohni tarah describe kardi, even staff di gall hundi. Bas thore personal experience , views/feelings di gall adhoori reh geyi
Total =9.8


Sandhu Freedkotia
Length = 3
Structure = 3
There’s a really nice structure. First strophe is a nice introduction. The next two strophes divides wisely the two important themes : personal feelings about pj and what peopole do on pj. The last strophe concludes the poem recalling  the introduction.  Really well structured poem
Content = 4
The poem has nothing to object/criticise. It deals with the theme without going off topic. Covers every aspect of the theme. There are both subjective views, personal feelings about pj and objective views on pj. It’s full of emotions from first  to last verse. Overall a complete Poem.
Total = 10


Desi Desi
Length = 1.75 (0.25 x 6)
Structure =  3
Very beautifully structured.  There’s a clear start, a main part and a clear conclusion. In few words he tells the story of these messages: how he finds them, what effect they do on him, and what he would like to with them.
Content = 3
The poem is full of emotions, feelings,  but pity ! it’s a bit off topic because the main topic of the poem seems to be  messages. Anyway, If he doesn’t talk about pj in general, he does talk about effects of pj on him.
Total=7.75


Ni yaar tera malang jiha urf kinnu
Length = 2 (-0.24 x 4)
Structure = 1,7
Har do verses touches different topics. Apas ch sari poem Rhyme “ook” karan juri hoi a. Par sari poem di ik common thought nahi lagdi jis uppar gall kiti ja rehi. What lacks is the "leitmotiv" of the poem. 
Content =3.5
Poem off topic nahi jandi. Beshak expressly pj di gall nahi hundi lagdi keo ke pj nu nominate nahi kita, par har verse ch pj implicitly dikh rehi. Har verse pj naal related a. In last verses the poem nearly covered  the aspect of "life on pj". However there’s a lack of pj’s effect on the poet. Emotions ghat a.
Total=7.2









VoterVoted forPostsStatus
ashfaq_gujrlaraki jatti (pj layi shayri)6712Y
NIMANI KAMALlaraki jatti (pj layi shayri)1407Y
behl.himlaraki jatti (pj layi shayri)796Y
skeemy dhillonlaraki jatti (pj layi shayri)695Y
♥♥ ਗਭਰੂ ਚੋਟੀ ਦਾ ♥♥laraki jatti (pj layi shayri)315Y
desi_jatt077laraki jatti (pj layi shayri)21N
Lucha_Indienpangebaaz mutyar (pj layi shayri)5035Y
Jatt.pangebaaz mutyar (pj layi shayri)3374Y
sanjana gillpangebaaz mutyar (pj layi shayri)4738Y
deep shergillpangebaaz mutyar (pj layi shayri)541Y
Mani Kaurpangebaaz mutyar (pj layi shayri)3023Y
rabbdabandapangebaaz mutyar (pj layi shayri)5615Y
Mor di Mornipangebaaz mutyar (pj layi shayri)1374Y
kala naagpangebaaz mutyar (pj layi shayri)66N
Manmeeetpangebaaz mutyar (pj layi shayri)702Y
RooHpangebaaz mutyar (pj layi shayri)293Y
sandhuonlineSandhu fridkotia (pj layi shayri)3123Y
KohiNoorSandhu fridkotia (pj layi shayri)9838Y
s_deepSandhu fridkotia (pj layi shayri)297Y
kamal.preetSandhu fridkotia (pj layi shayri)6501Y
The desi dudeNi yaar tera malang jiha urf kinnu (pj layi shayri)4075Y
laraki_jattiNi yaar tera malang jiha urf kinnu (pj layi shayri)1653Y
Top UserVotes100+ Voters
laraki jatti (pj layi shayri)5ashfaq_gujr, NIMANI KAMAL, behl.him, skeemy dhillon, ♥♥ ਗਭਰੂ ਚੋਟੀ ਦਾ ♥♥
pangebaaz mutyar (pj layi shayri)9Lucha_Indien, Jatt., sanjana gill, deep shergill, Mani Kaur, rabbdabanda, Mor di Morni, Manmeeet, RooH
Sandhu fridkotia (pj layi shayri)4sandhuonline, KohiNoor, s_deep, kamal.preet
Ni yaar tera malang jiha urf kinnu (pj layi shayri)2The desi dude, laraki_jatti



Janta's Choice


Total Votes Cast : 20 (excluding voters less than 100 posts)
Laraki Jatti : 5 votes
Percentage out of 50% : 5/20x 100% = 25% = 12.5%

Pangebaaz Mutiyaar :9 votes
Percentage out of 50%: 45% = 22.5%

Sandhu Faridkotia : 4 votes
Percentage out of 50%: 20% = 10%

Kinu
: 2 Votes
Percentage out of 50%: 10% = 5%








Critics Choice



Judge 1

Total Marks : 10
Laraki Jatti : 8.5
Percentage out of 50 : 8.5/10 x 50% = 42.5%
Pangebaaz Mutiyaar : 9
Percentage out of 50% : 45%
Sandhu Faridkotiya : 10
Percentage out of 50%: 50%
DesiDesi : 3.5
Percentage out of 50%: 17.5%
Kinu : 9
Percentage out of 50%: 45%


Judge 2

Total Marks : 10
Laraki Jatti : 6.5
Percentage out of 50 : 6.5/10 x 50% = 32.5%
Pangebaaz Mutiyaar : 7.6
Percentage out of 50% : 38%
Sandhu Faridkotiya : 7.4
Percentage out of 50%: 37%
DesiDesi : 4.2
Percentage out of 50%: 21%
Kinu : 4
Percentage out of 50%: 20%


Judge 3

Total Marks : 10
Laraki Jatti : 10
Percentage out of 50 : 10/10 x 50% = 50%
Pangebaaz Mutiyaar : 9.8
Percentage out of 50% : 49%
Sandhu Faridkotiya : 10
Percentage out of 50%: 50%
DesiDesi : 7.75
Percentage out of 50%: 38.75%
Kinu : 7.2
Percentage out of 50%: 36%




Average of all the judges


Laraki Jatti : 41.66%

Pangebaaz Mutiyaar : 44%

Sandhu Faridkotiya : 45.66%

DesiDesi : 25.75%

Kinu : 33.66%



Total points

 

 Laraki Jatti : 41.66% + 12.5% = 54.16%

Pangebaaz Mutiyaar : 44% + 22.5% = 66.5%

Sandhu Faridkotiya : 45.66% + 10% = 55.66%

DesiDesi : 25.75% + 0% = 25.75%

Kinu : 33.66% + 5% = 38.66%




Final Winner Of the Competition


Pangebaaz Mutiyaaar with 66.5%   :superhappy:

 =D> =D> =D> :blowout:

Everyone who participated did a great job. Each poetry was full of emotions, described very well and truly enjoyed it. Please do not take this scoring to your heart. The ONE & ONLY ONE reason if anyone has got less points it's only because of the requirements that I was given to keep in mind while scoring otherwise each and every one of you deserved full marks. To be honest no one should be rated because Poetry is full emotions and personal feelings and who am I to judge someone's personal feelings. The only reason this is being rated is so a winner can be decided otherwise we can never decide who won, right? You all did great job and please keep on writing for yourself and PJ.
Well Done everyone & Good Luck!
Thank you :)
« Last Edit: May 12, 2014, 03:50:45 AM by ☺ ṝaḃḃiẗ ☺ »

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